Jane’s Carousel,2011
Living in New York, we’re always complaining about the dirty streets, rats scattering around the subway stops and never ending noises. But, what about the beauties in NYC?
Matthew Pillsbury captures moments in NYC using long exposures for a cool and time lingering effect.
Check out Matthew Pillsbury’s Exhibition
When: through April 28 (10am-6pm)
Where: Bonni Benrubi
41E. 57th St., New York, NY 10022 near Madison Ave.
So much thought and drama around those 3 simple words, “I”, “Love” and “You”.
What men think when it comes to saying I Love you.
New York’s iconic artist Keith Haring is being commemorated with the unveiling of his mural, Once Upon a Time.
This mural is not in MoMA or any other museums in NY, but in one of the LGBT Center’s restrooms. Haring completed this mural only months before he died of AIDS and this area, yes the restroom now serves as a meeting place for the community.
This mural is open to the public. Going to the restroom is a typical romantic date place to go to, but it can be a change of scenery! Who said you always had to go to the museum to enjoy art?
Location: The LGBT Center (208 W 13th St, between Greenwich and Seventh Aves)
Phone: (212) 620-7310
Cost: Free
Date: Trough March 31, 2012
A good number of my friends are on board and are loving Coffee Meets Bagel- not because I’ve brain washed them with it but because they appreciate the quality of the members and the simplicity of the system.
Many of my friends have been matched and went on dates with their bagels. I was surprised to see the different personalities come out in this process. Once a bagel and coffee gets matched, they have a private line they can communicate through. This way they can text without giving each other’s real phone number.
There are 2 different ways different bagels approach this situation.
The first, which I thought would be the case for most matches, is that the two text for a couple of days to get to know each other. If the two “click” they will exchange their real numbers and plan a date to actually meet up for coffee.
However I’ve noticed that many bagels are much more aggressive, proactive and forward. After the first text, he goes straight to, “This is my phone number*** *** ****, what’s yours?” I’ve seen another bagel ask for the real number and asked if they could talk over the phone that evening. He skipped the whole texting process and jumped right into the phone call stage. Sexy and Confident? I don’t know, but definitely bold.
For my friend’s case she was turned off by such forwardness but I think it take’s great confidence. Also, it shows that the bagel did not want to beat around the bushes and knew what he wanted.
It’s hard to figure when it’s the right time to exchange each other’s real number, TALK on the phone and to meet up for a date, when you two have met through such social platform. But hey, have fun with it, don’t take it too seriously, but not too lightly.
If you two “click” hopefully you don’t have to think about it too much and can just go with the flow.
Check our video out! This is us, Coffee Meets Bagel in a minute :)
I bet many out there (including myself) are feeling super guilty about this one ;)
Maybe it’s smarter to NOT specify your relationship status on Facebook?
When you’re dating, the first thing that comes to mind probably isn’t “Will dating this person make me healthier?” Well, if it is, then you may be worrying a bit too much. Then again, if you are dating someone and it only makes you worry, then it’s probably best to get out of it as soon as possible. Two studies have proven the link between bad relationships and poor physical and mental health.
Lets start with the mental. A study by Case Western Reserve University showed that excessive worrying can create intrusive and obsessive behaviors that could negatively impact your relationships, romantic and otherwise. Though it studied people suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), its findings could be used for anyone that finds themselves worrying themselves into a corner – making them either too cold or too nurturing.Either way you feel, it will push the people you love away from you and make you more isolated.
The way to attack this problem is to get to the source – what made you worry in the first place? Does it come from somewhere real or imagined? Anything can make you worry but the best way to attack the problem is head-on: discuss it with your partner. They should understand completely. Don’t put it off too long, worrying does have a snowball effect. Just to top off the worrying, if you feel that you are suffering from GAD, please consult a therapist since this blog can only go so far.
Worrying will also result in physical health problems. If those problems mentioned before keep coming up again and again, you may be in a toxic relationship. The exact health problems that can result from these relationships were recently discovered by UCLA scientists. Negative interactions increases inflammation, which can result in heart disease, increased blood pressure, and cancer. Monitoring 122 healthy young people, scientists found that stressful events increased the production of inflammation-causing proteins.
Yeesh, that sounds terrible. Imagine staying in a bad relationship even for a few more weeks – it really can kill you in the long run. That’s why when something doesn’t work, you shouldn’t be afraid to say goodbye. Your health is more important than hurt feelings.
Mental and physical health are tied together tightly like a fine knot. One notch fails and the rest of it falls. Life is made up of the little things. A hug. A compliment. A glare. An argument. You should never neglect looking out for your own health first. It’s more important than any petty argument will ever be.
Yes, it’s that time of the year again. In just one more day, it will be a new year and a lot of people are really feeling it. Don’t believe me? Recent research has shown that dating sites have been receiving a 15 to 20 percent jump in activity.
It’s no wonder. This year went by pretty fast and, for those who believe in certain Mayan prophecies concerning next year, trying to get a date before New Years Eve is the most important thing you can do before the end of the world. That apocalyptic feeling really isn’t new to this year, though. This time of year may be joyful on the surface but there has always been a deep undercurrent of loneliness for those looking through the window at other happy couples. Trying to get a date before New Years isn’t an act of desperation. This is an attempt to no longer be on the outside looking in.
This trend doesn’t stop after New Years. From now until Valentine’s Day is the busiest time for dating websites. We now live, quoting Thomas Friedman, in a hyper-connected world. This means that we feel intimately connected with more people outside our immediate social network than ever before because of social media and intimate access to the lives of others through their profiles. Whereas before online dating there was uncertainty as to where you can meet that special someone, now you have sites that can help. While online dating was a joke ten years ago, now it’s more socially acceptable to say you met your partner online. To speak to this paradigm shift, approximately 10% of singles in the US used dating sites in 2011. I can’t speak for all of their motivations but it shows how the Internet has changed where dating begins.
There are a plethora of articles out there about how people are trying to connect with each other out of desperation. For the most part, that isn’t the case. I believe that this trend shows that, deep down, people are looking to find someone they click with to start the new year fresh. As Auld Lang Syne implies, the new year is the start of new beginnings as we throw everything else away. With the millions of potential connections out there, there is bound to be the perfect one for you.
Happy New Year one and all! May you find that special someone in the glorious year of 2012.
-Brett
This New Yorker’s article is probably the most comprehensive article summarizing the birth and history of online dating in the US.
Some lines that are memorable to me:
“Often the people who go on the sites that promise you a match are so primed to find one that they jump at the first or the second or the third who comes along. The people who are looking may not be the people you are looking for. “It’s a selection problem when you round up a bunch of people who want to settle down,” Chris Coyne, one of the founders of a site called OK Cupid, told me”
Well, isn’t that what happens in real life? It’s all about meeting the right person at the right time and right place. At least the “selection problem” of online dating gets rid of having to fit the right time and place so you just have to find the right person. Trust me, it’s not that there is one RIGHT PERSON who is just waiting to be found at a corner somewhere in the world.
“Starting a site is like starting a restaurant. It’s a sexy business, looks like fun, yet it’s hard to make money.” There is, as yet, a disconnect between success and profit. “The way these companies make money is not directly correlated to the utility that users get from the product,” Harj Taggar, a partner at the Silicon Valley seed fund Y Combinator, told me. “What they really should be doing is making money if they match you with people you like.”
Amen! It doesn’t take a genius to recognize why match.com or eharmony.com or even howaboutwe.com put you in a subscription plan! They don’t make money if you meet someone and leave right away. That’s the dilemma of these dating sites—your customers can’t be too successful or too unsuccessful. I think dating sites should make money if and only if they actually help the user find someone they like.
“Men want someone who will take care of them, make them look good, and have sex with them—not necessarily in that order.” Love it. “There is a fundamental imbalance in the social dynamic,” Harj Taggar, the investor at Y Combinator, told me. “The most valuable asset is attractive females. As soon as you get them, you get loads of creepy guys.”
So it’ a mystery to me why so many dating sites cater to how men date. C’mon, women don’t care about browsing through thousands of men’s photos. We don’t have time for that and if we do, we rather look at women’s photos!
The social science behind what attracts men and women is so addictive that I can go on forever. And it is no wonder that there are so many dating services with various niche ranging from matching based on DNA, facial resemblance to what makes people laugh. But sometimes, all you need is an easier way to meet decent, normal people, period. Everything else can be figured out and decided by the couple themselves.
You can read more about the article at:
http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2011/07/04/110704fa_fact_paumgarten#ixzz1gS2wwjzO
Hunch, intuition, gut-feeling, voice whispering in your ears—whatever you may call it, I have experienced, repeatedly, many instances when my first intuition proved to be right.
In this interesting study conducted by Psychologist and Villanova University Associate Professor Rebecca J. Brand, women could intuitively evaluate men’s physical attractiveness from their written online profiles. Without photos, they were asked to evaluate men’s attractiveness from their writing. The result—the women actually didn’t need photos to to discern which ones are attractive.
This Huffington Post article does not include the details of how these women evaluated men’s attractiveness and how much it correlated with the actual attractiveness of the photos. The interpretation is that women are generally attracted to confident men, and the confidence level is reflected in men’s writing. And because our looks/attractiveness impact our confidence level, the more confident you are, the likely that you are attractive.
I find it fascinating that even in such short online profiles, such deeply personal traits can be analyzed. More interesting question would be whether this would apply if done among men. I don’t think for women, being attractive necessarily translates to confidence. In fact, a lot of attractive women I know are insecure. Also, I am not sure if men will be able to pick up on these subtle cues. It would be an interesting study.