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The Mortifying Reason I Called My Boyfriend ‘Hey Dude’ the First Month We Were Dating

November 21, 2014/in Date Stories /by Guest Blogger

The following article is a guest post, courtesy of Alexa Hampton

One of my most memorable adventures in love was with my boyfriend, who (to my great shame) I almost broke up with a month after we started dating because I didn’t know his name.
Yeah, you read that right.
During that month, I lived in perpetual fear that I would be put in a situation where I couldn’t address him as “hey dude.”
What if we accidentally end up at a karaoke bar, and they pull me on stage and ask who I’m here with? I panicked. I could just see an obnoxious, washed up announcer saying, “Who! Give us a name!” as my cheeks flush bright red.
Or worse, what if there is some kind of medical emergency and I can’t identify my own date? A man who has already introduced me to all his friends and was more interested in seeing me than them (no offense, guys) on his 24th birthday?
The horror…

Anyone who has spent time at a bar knows most men within these establishments are not “real” people. They are there to find girls, and if you are not interested in being one of them, you must be almost insufferably rude — sometimes cutting them off mid-sentence with a “no thanks”  — in order to make your point.
It was with that mentality that I went into what seemed to be any other night out, though it ended up being the night I met my boyfriend.
It was late September in the city, and we were at a trendy rooftop bar in Midtown. It was one of the last weekends we could all be outside, and I was pleasantly surprised when I found myself speaking with a well-dressed young man emitting zero sketchy vibes.
As the conversation progressed, I discovered that not only was he from my home state of Minnesota, he went to my rival high school. And I knew he wasn’t lying because he said where he was from before I did.
We stayed out late and I ended up putting his name in my phone as “Minnesota guy.” When he started texting me later that week, I tried in vain to recall his name, cursing myself for paying more attention to whether people have kind or crazy eyes when they introduce themselves than the words coming out of their mouths (Minnesota guy had extremely kind eyes, by the way).
“Hi! Who is this?” I texted back, pretending I had mis-entered his number into my phone.
“We met on Saturday at Sutton Place,” he responded. “Want to grab a drink this weekend?”
Fail.

I put “Minnesota guy” off for another week or so, but when he invited me to his birthday party, I figured there was no harm in stopping by. I warned him that I wouldn’t be able to get there until after 10:00 p.m., since I had a work thing, but he didn’t seem to mind. Nevertheless, I assumed he would be wasted by the time I got there.
I was a little surprised when his friends all seemed to know who I was, and that my reticent date ended up being way more handsome than I remembered. I was equally surprised that he stuck by my side the whole party — I figured I would be one of many random people there — and that when I decided to leave, he hailed a cab and escorted me home. He had had a few drinks, but was still completely coherent.
We said goodnight in the lobby, and as I walked up to my apartment, the events of the night replayed themselves in my head.
He’s actually quite cute, I thought. Why didn’t I notice that before? I was also absurdly flattered that I seemed to be the only girl he had eyes for.
As the weeks passed, we began seeing each other every weekend. Minnesota guy impressed me more each time I saw him. When I got us hopelessly lost trying to find a bar I’d been to once and really liked, he made zero snide comments and gave me zero judgmental looks, despite spending probably $50 in cabs. Instead, he laughed and suggested we try a place nearby, and the whole time we were talking like old friends.
A little over a month later — when I realized I genuinely liked him — I had a minor panic attack over the fact that I still did not know his name. I knew I couldn’t continue the “hey dude” charade much longer; it was only a matter of time before my secret shame was revealed.

I called my mom and told her the whole situation, and she encouraged me not to give up.
“What if you bring one of your friends the next time you go out, and they ask his name?” she suggested.
“Too risky,” I grimaced. “And also, that’d just look bad at this point, since all his friends knew my name a month ago.”
Eventually my mom convinced me to stick it out. He seemed like a wonderful man, and you can’t throw something like that away for the sake of avoiding embarrassment, she said.
Thankfully, my big break came the next day.
We were going to a bar neither of us had been to and, as we were handing over our IDs, Minnesota guy made a comment about how he had just gotten his license renewed.
“Really!” I said, feigning extreme interest. “Let’s see your new picture!”
I snatched his license before he could put it away, and there it read: “Mark Emerson.”
Yessssssss! I could hardly repress my excitement.

I had tried everything to uncover his name. I spent more hours on Facebook than I have since high school, but try as I might, I could not find him. I asked my brother-in-law, who went to his high school, if he remembered anyone who matched the description: kind eyes, light brown hair, lives in NYC now and is a year younger than you?
I got a few options, but none showed a match on Facebook and I wasn’t comfortable throwing out, “Thanks, Kevin!” this late in the game to see if it was a match. If someone said, “Thanks, Rachel!” to me after a month, I would probably never speak to them again.
I had been uncertain about the subject for so long, I almost didn’t feel comfortable saying his real name, though I assumed it was right — it was on his license, after all.
“So, Mark…” I ventured. “Have you traveled at all?”
He responded without seeming puzzled. Score. Plus, I found out he’s also a big traveler. Score and a half, really.
It’s been over two years now since the events I’ve related, and I’m still more impressed with Mark every time I see him. When I told him about a year in that I originally didn’t know his name, he smiled and told me he kinda knew.
“Are you serious?” I asked. “What gave me away?”
“Well,” he responded. “You called me ‘dude’ a lot…”


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Christina and Remy

This Is What Happened After Two People Met For The First Time

November 17, 2014/in Date Stories /by CMB

Profiles of Christina and Remy

Their Story

Christina and Remy seem to have a genuine excitement for each other that translates through text and photos. From cooking classes to roadtrips, their relationship looks like an enviable adventure. They are 2 adventurous foodies who met via Coffee Meets Bagel.

Roadtrip Christina and Remy
Little did Remy know, one of their dates would include biking across the Golden Gate Bridge.

Their two Coffee Meets Bagel profiles are oddly similar in spirited tone and eclectic preference. It’s a wonder that they hadn’t found each other sooner. “The first thing I noticed on Christina’s profile,” Remy states, “was how adventurous her pictures were. Cliff diving in one and petting a tiger in another,…I immediately started wonder[ing] what kind of dates we’d be going on.”
Christina, likewise, says of Remy, “What sealed the deal was his profile pic[ture], it was very different from what I was seeing everyday from the others.”
The first Sunday after they connected via Coffee Meets Bagel, they met for lunch at Fish Bar in Chicago. Remy describes the conversation as effortless and fun. “When he offered to grab ice cream after, I was hooked (I love ice cream).” Christina adds.
They don’t quite know when they became official, Christina confesses, though we think that they look so great together that it doesn’t matter anyway. Their advice to Coffee Meets Bagel Members? “Be patient,” Christina advises, “it takes a lot of first dates and almost first dates to realize what you’re looking for and what you’re not!” And it seems that patience paid off.
Timeline
Did you like this post? Be sure to check out “If This Isn’t Romantic, Then I Don’t Know What Is!“


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Three Summer Festivals You Can’t Miss

June 6, 2013/in Date Ideas /by Guest Blogger

At long last, Summer is here, and that means festival season. Whether you’re a seasoned vet or a first-time festie, get out your road maps, pack the Westfalia, and check out these three summer festivals you can’t miss to find romance, or to experience with that special someone.

Screen Shot 2013-06-06 at 1.48.01 PM

1. EDC Las Vegas
June 18th-25th, Las Vegas Motor Speedway, Nevada. Electronic/Ambient/Bass music.
This is the great grand-daddy of them all, a show that evolved from a one-day event of a couple thousand people in the Shrine Expo Hall in LA, to what is now a week-long event culminating in a three day music blowout that is the Mecca for electronic music, boasting a veritable who’s who of figureheads in the EDM scene. If that’s not enough, it is the largest North American electronic music festival and dance music event ever, last year packing in 300,000+ attendees. It’s also one of the most attractive, drawing what is arguably the most appealing-looking clientele ready to bust a move on the dance floor. Whether you’re looking for love or want to bring your special someone out for an unforgettable experience, EDC Las Vegas is something truly to behold.

Screen Shot 2013-06-06 at 1.39.10 PM

2. Electric Forest
June 27th-30th, Rothbury Michigan. Electronic/Bluegrass/Alternative/Indy Pop.
Feel like cutting a rug in the woods to electronic beats, drink moonshine to some bluegrass, and find romance to some of the best contemporary music the world has to offer all at the same time? Now you can. One of the most eclectic and bizarre festivals on the list is Electric Forest, a three-day celebration of modern music and art set in the woods of Michigan. It has something for everyone, including interactive art pieces, carnival rides, and one of the funkiest lineups ever seen, bridging the festival gap of several different genres. This is an excellent opportunity to go have a backwoods experience, see some music and get your groove on with some of the legends of the festival music scene, like String Cheese Incident, and Pretty Lights. It is a great road trip destination, and a great place to find romance in America’s heartland.

Screen Shot 2013-06-06 at 1.44.09 PM

3.  Outside Lands
August 9th-11th, San Francisco California. Alternative/Rock/???
This festival is like a hand-picked selection of the top ten from your iTunes library, with headliners like Paul McCartney, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Willie Nelson. This show is one not to be missed, as many of the artists found on the list are ones you may never see again, in an intimate setting you will never forget (alumni include Stevie Wonder, Al Green, and Radiohead, who had the first ever night show in the park at the first ever Outside Lands in 2008.) It also acts as a showcase for some of the best food and wine from local artisans, featuring a food truck village and circus tent with tasting booths for local wineries. Plus, it’s full of San Franciscans, some of the most friendly and easy on the eyes people in the whole world. This is a great one to make new friends you’ll never forget, or take a date to something you both will thoroughly enjoy.

What Men Think: Professing His Love Sex, Love & Life: glamour.com

March 13, 2012/in Date Tips /by CMB

So much thought and drama around those 3 simple words, “I”, “Love” and “You”.

What men think when it comes to saying I Love you.

March 12, 2012/in Uncategorized /by CMB

I like the individualized touch to the program. i think its better than okcupid and other mass dating sites because you dont feel like you’re one of 10000 other options waiting to be picked off the shelf.” Coffee L

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