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Your Profile Picture is Worth a Thousand Words…What Are They?

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In honor of our new CMB mobile app, we are doing a series of posts focused on mobile phones and the best dating apps. Today, we’re breaking down the types of profile pictures of guys you find on a mobile dating app. Read on!

Everyone knows first impressions are important. They are even more so with the increasing popularity of mobile dating apps and decreasing attention spans. Your profile picture can find you your soulmate or leave you in the dust of missed connections and abandoned Bagels. Dating coaches give endless advice on how to choose the perfect photo to upload. Find the most flattering lighting, look directly at the camera, don’t look directly at the camera, smile! With all the advice out there, it’s hard to keep track. No matter which picture you choose to upload, remember that a picture is a worth a thousand words. Let’s take a look at what those words are.

Holding puppy/baby/cute object

He knows puppies and babies are women magnets and is using that fact to his advantage. Even so, who can resist a man being smothered by puppy kisses?

On stage at a tech conference delivering a keynote

He’s founding his own startup or funding other people’s. You know that he’s techy, nerdy, and has serious net worth. What’s not to love?

Professional glamour shot

Hope that he did this in an ironic way to be funny. Complete with props and poses that attempt to be sexy and mysterious…he’s either a goofball or way too into himself.

Group photo of his office softball team

You know he’s social, has at least that many friends, and is fit enough to lift a bat. Just make sure you’re looking at the right guy!

Shirtless selfie

The only time a shirtless profile picture is acceptable is if he is at the beach/pool/body of water (the toilet doesn’t count). Pass!

So there you have it. Five types of guys you meet through dating apps, solely based on their profile pictures. Which one are you?

LOVE STATS

Wow! 71% of Americans Believe in Love at First Sight and More Interesting Online Dating Statistics

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The following article is a guest post, courtesy of Lily Rudolph

Hey Bagels!  Last month my favorite stat-site, Statistic Brain released a set of fascinating online dating statistics.  Since we love e-love, I want to take this opportunity to highlight some dating statistics with you!
71% of Americans believe in love at first sight — Since this is the age of e-dating, maybe we should modernize the phrase to love at first site.
dating statistics
40 million people in the United States have tried online dating.  No wonder it’s becoming a social norm!     52.4% of online daters are male while 47.6% are female
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At 26, Women have more online pursuers than men.  By the time they reach 48, Men have twice as many online pursuers as Women.
dating statistics

Women lie most about: Weight, Physical Build, and Age              Men lie most about; Age, Height, and Income
dating statistics

Thanks for the info Statistic Brain!

online dating threatens monogamy?

The Best New Years Resolution

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By now, most people in the dating world have already seen or heard about the recent Atlantic article about how online dating is purportedly threatening monogamy as we know it. In the chaotic aftermath of that article, many people likely received frantic calls from their parents, pleading with them to close all their online dating accounts and to “stop trivializing romance!”
Fortunately for the monogamists and worried parents of the world, a rebuttal article surfaced on The Atlantic the next day, claiming that, statistically, there is little evidence to support such dire claims. But what the evidence did suggest is that online dating may actually lead to more marriages by helping people find more strongly compatible partners.
We at Coffee Meets Bagel wanted to jump into this debate, so last week we pushed out a survey asking our lovely bagels what they thought about online dating and whether it was affecting their ability to seek and sustain good relationships. We published a sneak peak of our results on Thursday, and we can confidently say that, at least among the Coffee Meets Bagel population, online dating has not diminished the majority of users’ desire or ability to find serious relationships.
Commitment is safe!
In fact, 65 percent of Coffee Meets Bagel users said they are primarily looking for a relationship. And online dating doesn’t seem to be hurting anyone’s prospects of finding that sort of relationship. When asked if online dating makes them want more casual dates and fewer serious relationships, 60 percent of men and 50 percent of women said that it has no impact either way, and interestingly, 14 percent of men and 40 percent of women said online dating has the opposite effect – it causes them to want more serious, monogamous relationships! This flies in the face of the original Slater article, which suggested that online daters would be paralyzed by the breadth of alternative matches and thus never be willing to fully commit to the match they found.
Online dating may actually help with commitment.
One interesting finding from our survey is that, of the people who believed that online dating made them actually want to more strongly seek committed relationships, most believed that as they met more and more people from online dating sites, they increasingly realized just how hard it can be to find the right match. Rather than give up on finding a match, our bagels seem to emerge from online dating more resolute than ever to find their special someone. Maybe that’s the best New Years resolution of all.
Starbucks $10 Gift Certificate Winner
Thanks everyone for participating! Here are the 3 winners of the survey. We will email you with more details on how you can redeem your gift.
Kat*********@ymail.com
sun*********@gmail.com
all*********@gmail.com

Fill out my online form.

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

App Store

Online Dating Does Not Threaten Monogamy!

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More detail to come this coming Sunday but here is a sneak preview on the results of the survey on online dating we conducted last week:
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‘Coffee Meets Bagel’ Data Reveals Online Dating Does Not Threaten Monogamy

Social dating site’s survey of more than 500 members shows that 67 percent of men and 79 percent of women are looking for a serious relationship or spouse.

Coffee Meets Bagel, a social dating site that utilizes its members’ social graphs to find daily matches, today announced the results of its survey on the effects that online dating has on singles. Findings include what users are looking for out of online dating services, how online dating affects their views on long-term relationships and their outlook on dating in today’s society.
Coming off the heels of the recent controversy surrounding online dating’s negative effect on monogamy, coupled with a spike in New Years resolutions surrounding dating, Coffee Meets Bagel sought to find out about its users’ preferences when it comes to using an online dating service.
Survey results reveal that online dating does not threaten monogamy, and it often times causes users to desire more serious relationships instead of continuous casual dates.
Online Dating Users Are Serious About Relationships:
Nearly 65 percent of Coffee Meets Bagel users said they are primarily looking for a serious relationship from online dating, with an almost even amount of men and women responding accordingly. An additional 13 percent of women and 4 percent of men claimed they are looking for a spouse.
When asked if online dating causes users to seek casual dates with multiple partners instead of serious relationships, 60 percent of men and 50 percent of women said it has no impact. In fact, another 14 percent of men and 40 percent of women said it has the opposite effect – online dating actually causes them to want more serious, monogamous relationships. The main reason mentioned for this was that meeting people via online dating reminded them of “how difficult it is to find the right person.”
In a comparison of online and offline dating, the majority said that online dating makes it easier to meet new, interesting people and go on casual dates without causing any difference in their ability to find a serious partner. Only 18 percent of men and women believe that online dating makes it more difficult to find a serious partner.
“The survey findings show us that there’s an opportunity for services like ours to help our members find what they’re looking for in the dating world without tainting their overall perspective on relationships,” said Dawoon Kang, co-founder of Coffee Meets Bagel. “What’s interesting is that the majority of our users are fairly young [in their twenties], yet they’re still looking for something serious. The survey results also break some of the gender stereotypes about dating – we think it’s encouraging to see that an equal number of men and women are looking for serious relationships from online dating and believe that it makes it easier to meet interesting people.”
How Do Men and Women Measure Up?
Just about half (49 percent) of men and exactly half of women say that online dating does not make their ability to find a serious partner any harder. The majority of both sexes agree that, in comparison to offline dating, it is much easier to meet new, interesting people via online services.
However, men and women have different opinions when it comes to pickiness. Of the 18 percent of respondents who believe online dating makes finding a serious relationship difficult, more than 50 percent of men believe this is the case because online dating has caused people to become pickier, whereas less than half of women find this to be true.

In Response to OK Gorgeous

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Dawoon here, your CMB co-founder! Yesterday we got a tough but fair analysis of our site by OK Gorgeous writer Amy Copperman. Copperman used the site, assessed it, and concluded that Coffee Meets Bagel is not a ”vehicle for anything deeper than scoring more first dates.”

True, our daily matches do give you lots of chances for first dates — and don’t you need that first date to see if round two is worth a shot? The problem with 21st century dating is not that singles can’t score second dates and more – the real problem is there aren’t many opportunities to connect with new quality singles. Ironically, when we have many friends to hang out with and too many things to do, we have less time to make new connections.

Our members crave to meet new, interesting people, and we love helping them make that initial connection. A critical difference between CMB and other dating services is that there is no “browsing;” you simply get one person a day. Copperman explained how this can be disconcerting, but our philosophy is that the lack of browsing makes a person on CMB a lot more special because you’re not amongst one of the thousands of people being sorted through.

The piece also made a good point – is CMB a site that helps you in “finding the one” or just “finding the one you want to have coffee with.” To us, someone we want to have coffee with is a great start to finding the one — because relationships and chemistry is hard to predict, and you just never know.

There are a lot of dating sites out today, as Copperman noted. A common response I get when I tell people that I run an online dating company is “I don’t do online dating.” I always respond by asking, “Why not?” I think everyone who is single and looking to meet others should be doing so both online and offline; dating sites are just additional channels to meet who you are looking for. Many people are concerned with overwhelming profiles and meeting creeps online. I founded CMB so I could address both concerns – It’s easy and simple— 3 minutes a day to check in, done. And there’s no creepy factor because our matches are your friends of friends!

OK Gorgeous has always been one of my go-to sources for cheeky news – and we at CMB dug the feedback from a straight-talker like Copperman. A critical eye is what makes us keep striving to make our site better for our users. As always, feel free to share your thoughts, comments and suggestions with us at [email protected]!

online dating tips

A gal's experiment with online dating: Guys in NY vs. SF

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I guess you could say it was a hectic weekend— after all, I did get four different phone numbers from four different people in two very different cities.

The Experiment:

There are four single gals working at Coffee Meets Bagel and you know what that means -most of our noons are spent comparing our Bagels and 90% of our office conversation revolves around dating & guys. One of these many conversations was on online dating with guys in SF vs. NY, as some of us are native Californians and some relocated from NY. The heated debate about the quality of guys in the two cities led to an interesting experiment proposal: To sign up for an online dating site in both NY & SF with the same exact profile and compare the guys that approached us. (We selfishly didn’t want to “experiment” with our own members so signed up for another site which shall remain anonymous). Of course, I was picked as a guinea pig.

Results:

In just one weekend, I found a city’s dating scene is very much reflective of its culture.

Guys in NYC

Let’s start off with NYC. From the 12 messages that I received in just 2 days, I noticed a trend between them all. The basic theme was “What’s your number? Let me buy you a drink.” The messages were blunt and straight to the point; it was as if all these guys were pressed for time! They weren’t looking to make a small talk with me through online chat – they wanted to meet me and see for themselves what kind of person I am. Very reflective of the NYC culture: fast-paced, direct, and upfront.

Guys in SF

The dating scene in SF was a whole other ballgame. From the 16 messages I received, what I experienced was long chats on Saturday and Sunday nights about topics ranging from school to work to music. Whether or not they were doing this because they wanted to get to know me or they were just timid, I guess I’ll never know. What I do know is that these guys were definitely not the “let’s meet up now and figure out who we are later” type; these guys wanted to get to know me before they made their decision to ask me out. To me, this seemed much more familiar. As a Bay Area native, I’ve grown accustomed to a slower environment of dating and getting to know someone. Things are much more slow-paced and relaxed.

Simple comparison charts (caveat: highly subjective):

online dating tips

Notable message:

image

And the winning city is…!!

So what’s the verdict here? Surprisingly enough, I found myself preferring NYC’s style. I thought I would prefer the more relaxed appeal that SF had to offer, but there was something in the straightforward, “I-don’t-have-time-for-small-talk” attitude that I found so refreshing. My heart belongs to the Bay Area, but I have to admit: I much prefer the no-bullshit approach that NYC has to offer. SF guys! Can we be a little bit more blunt!

About the writer: Michelle is the Head of Community at Coffee Meets Bagel.

CMB Men’s Series: 5 Unique Gifts to Make Her Day

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CMB Men’s Series is original content dedicated to (confused) men and dating in the city.
Part V of our series welcomes another guest post by Amanda Raye, Editor-in-Chief of Broke & Chic. Visit her at www.brokeandchic.com and @brokeandchic. 
Is your anniversary coming up? Is her birthday right around the corner? No matter why you’re gifting your significant other, our list of awesome subscription services will help you find the perfect present to make your special someone swoon.
Why are subscription services so great? Because she’ll be reminded of your gift for months! Every time the box arrives, she’ll have nothing to do but think of you!
Best of all, these presents can also help you lose your shopping stress, since you won’t have to even set foot into the mall!
1. Craft Coffee

If your girl is a coffee lover, this coffee subscription will put a smile on her face every morning. Craft Coffee tries 50+ different coffees from roasters around the world. After a series of tests, only the top three make it into the box.
She’ll be able to experience coffee on a whole new level by drinking some of the country’s best coffees. If you want to go all out, get a one year subscription for $240. If you’re tight on money, just purchase a month or two at $24.99/month.
Link: http://www.craftcoffee.com/
2. Glossy Box

Do you cringe every time your girl comes home with a bag from Sephora? Then Glossy Box might be the answer to your wallet woes. Each month, your girl will receive 5 luxury travel-sized beauty products in a beautiful pink box. She’ll love the fact she’s getting to try out all these luxury beauty products before she commits to buying them full-size.
If she loves one of them, you’ll know what to get her for Valentines Day! Grab a three month subscription for only $60!
Link: http://www.glossybox.com/
3. Dejamore

Here’s a subscription meant for the both of you — a monthly gift for your relationship. Dejamore creates exciting and romantic experiences for you and your partner.
Every month you’ll receive two boxes. One will say “For Her Eyes Only” and the other “For His Eyes Only”. Inside you could find something cute, sexy or extremely intimate, it’s different every month. If your girl was a Fifty Shade of Grey fan, she’ll love this!
Link: http://dejamor.com/
4. Art in a Box

Is your girl an art lover? If so, she’ll love this subscription service. Art in a Box allows subscribers to receive custom-picked, high-quality works of art worth much more than the subscription cost.
Give your girl a head start on her art collection for only $50/month. Since this is more on the pricey side, just commit to a month or two.
Link: http://artinabox.net/
5. Baublebar

This isn’t a subscription service, but it should be on your radar since all girls love jewelry! Baublebar is the perfect place to buy high quality statement pieces without a high price tag.
If you’re brave enough, you can pick a beautiful piece out yourself. If you know she’d rather pick one out herself, just buy a gift card. $50 will allow her to add a few gorgeous pieces to her collection!
Link: http://baublebar.com/

CMB Men's Series: How to Score a 2nd Date

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CMB Men’s Series is original content dedicated to (confused) men and dating in the city.
Guys typically know within 30 seconds of meeting a girl whether she is compatible and has long term potential. However, just because it’s easy for us to recognize potential, it doesn’t mean that it’s easy to convince the date that we’re worth their time.
Here are 4 essential steps to take on a first date that will help you land a 2nd.
1. Plan the Proper First Date
Choose somewhere you are familiar with, a place where you may know the owners or the best dishes to order. The goal of the first date is to get to know each other, so let her see you in your most comfortable environment.
Less is more!  No need for pre-dinner drinks, dinner, post-dinner drinks, Broadway Show..etc. She’s not getting  a realistic perception of you if you put on a production.  And guess what? If you continue to see each other, she will continue to keep expectations high.
Keep it simple.  82% of women polled in CMB’s survey said that they typically go to a coffee shop or bar on a first date. Dating on a budget in NYC? Click here for our hand picked pocket friendly date ideas that will still impress your lady.
Keep a 3 hour time limit. The success of a date doesn’t depend on duration. Having a time pressure will motivate you to get to know your date within that time period, and may leave her wanting more.
Video courtesy of Ms. Singlefied. Visit her at singlefied.com or @singlefiedyue.
2. Ask Her Questions
Obvious fact of the day: women like to talk.  Studies have shown that women communicate more verbally then men.  So naturally it’s easy to let the conversation become one-sided, but don’t let it turn into an interrogation where she’s peppering you with questions.  Take the lead and engage her with questions that show your genuine interest in who she is, where she comes from, and what her values are.
3. Pick Up the Tab

Splitting the bill, or going ‘Dutch’, might make sense to some.  You hardly know each other, the economy stinks, and she has a job. But sorry guys, if you don’t make an effort to pick up the tab, there may not be a 2nd date. Want proof?
CMB’s survey showed that 87%! of women either feel they should never pay on a first date or secretly hope the guy would pay the full bill. Chivalry, and more importantly the expectation of chivalry, is very much still alive.
4. Forget the 2 day/ 3 day/ 1 week rules

There are numerous rules that guys follow for when to contact the girl after the first date. We’ve heard anywhere from 2 days to a week.  However, CMB’s survey showed that most women would touch base the day after the date if it went well (assuming they would initiate). Therefore, you will not come across as a lonely desperate stalker if you contact her the following day.  Keep in mind that 1 out of 3 women said they would never follow up with a date after the first date. Moral of the story – if you want to see her again, don’t wait until Christmas to tell her.

How to Tell If She's Interested or Just Being Nice

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CMB Men’s Series is original content dedicated to (confused) men and dating in the city.
Part III of our series welcomes the return of Yue Xu, Dating Coach for men and Founder of Singlefied.  Visit her at www.singlefied.com and @SinglefiedYue.

It’s no secret that guys are terrible at reading women. Here’s how you can tell if she’s actually into you or just being nice.

We're not your ordinary "Online Dating Site"

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The dating service industry is worth more than $2 billion and is constantly growing. Yet the stigma attached to the word “online dating” never seems to diminish.

There are some good points made by those who disapprove online dating. Here is an article that lays out why online dating is a mis in providing people with chances for true romance, mainly based off an interview with Eli Finkel, an associate professor of psychology at Northwestern University.

Negativo

1. Online dating sites pours out TOO MANY profiles of people that lack information, and you end up “shopping” for a future lover
2. Questions the accuracy and reliability of the algorithm online dating sites are using, and believes the algorithm does not produce any better results than meeting someone in random. 

I think Finkel has a point here. Coming through endless lists of profiles that may or may not come with long essays about their lives and personalities (self-reflected…i really question how accurate that is in some cases) can get nauseating and time consuming. It’s already off to a bad start when you feel drained even in the process of getting started before the actual date.

That’s why we pride so much in what we are and what we do. Coffee Meets Bagel cuts down the time and work our members have to do. We too strongly disapprove the idea of “shopping” for your potential romantic interest and even more so of being drained out and discouraged during the process of meeting someone.

As for the algorithm aspect, yes people may say they want one thing and indicate that on their profiles but when they are matched with the person with all the points they may not have chemistry and have nothing to do with each other. Yet we added something more to just what people put on their profiles. CMB connects people through their mutual friends, helping them to have a better judgement on what the person is like and automatically gets rid of that fear factor, “what is this dude is creeper..I don’t even know him.”

That is why we would rather be called as an online social gaming platform where people meet, build their network, and hopefully find love on the way. We’re not an “online dating site” where people shop for love. We make it happen by connecting people quickly as possible and allowing them to SPEAK  and COMMUNICATE with each other to find out who they really are. No lingering behind profiles and guessing.

So at the end of the day I guess Finkel and CMB do come to the same conclusion. “There’s no better way to figure out whether you’re compatible with somebody than talking to them over a cup of coffee,” said Finkel and we absolutely agree. Hence our name, Coffee Meets Bagel :) 

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