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How to spot the new crypto scam targeting online daters

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Scams are nothing new. We’ve all heard the cautionary tale about emails from a “friend” asking for a loan while they wait for their enormous trust fund to kick in.

But the latest online dating scam is much more clever than a shady email. It also has a new angle: cryptocurrency investing. Known as the “Pig Butchering Scam,” it started in China but is now targeting dating sites all over the world. It’s become such a problem that the FBI recently sent out this warning. They’ve received over 1,800 complaints about this new scam in the first seven months of 2021 alone.

This scam can be harder to spot than others, but that doesn’t mean you have to feel unsafe while dating. Keep reading to learn the ins and outs of the Pig Butchering Scam, from what it looks like to how to avoid it.

How the new crypto scam works

Wonder why it’s called the Pig Butchering Scam? It’s because these scammers play the long game. First, they gain your trust, then they “lead you to the butcher.” Here’s how it goes down. 

After matching on a dating site, they’ll spend one to three months making you comfortable. They’re trained on how to act and have scripts for countless scenarios. So, everything feels real.

Next, they’ll suggest they can help you make a lot of money in cryptocurrency investment. Keep in mind, they won’t ask you directly for any money or your personal information. They might even encourage you to buy crypto from a legitimate exchange.

From there, you’ll be directed to a fake third-party website or app to start investing. The phony sites are top-notch, complete with “customer service.”

You’ll start to see a “profit” and they’ll even let you “withdraw” a small amount of money. This is a trick to further gain your trust. Once you’re feeling confident, the scammer will convince you to invest larger amounts. They’ll use phrases like “act fast” or shame you into feeling like you’re not giving enough.

But when you try to withdraw money again, the scammer or fake customer service representative won’t allow it. You’re told that fees or taxes are owed, or the minimum account balance hasn’t been met. The excuses continue until you realize it’s all a scam. At this point, the scammer vanishes – along with your invested money.

So far, large losses have been the norm. The Global Anti-Scam Organization, a volunteer group led by victims of this scam, found that the average loss was $98,000 and about 70 percent of victims were women, most with a bachelor’s degree.

Want an insider’s look into how it works? Check out this video from a fellow online dater who fell victim to the scam.

An online dater goes into detail about how they fell for the popular “Pig Butchering Scam”

Tips for spotting a scammer

So, what does an actor from the Pig Butchering Scam tend to look like? This list won’t match every person involved in the scheme, but here are some general guidelines:

✔️ Realistic profile names with an age range of 28-35 years old

✔️ Fluent in Chinese while also speaking in broken English (They might claim to use a translator)

✔️ Works as a business owner or a field such as finance, medical supplies, or sales

✔️ Studied finance or accounting and invests in crypto, forex, or gold as a hobby

✔️ Shares luxury-type pictures, including cars, jewelry, and handbags

So, this scam is less obvious than ones that ask you for your personal information or money upfront. But there are still some other warning signs that can help you spot a scammer.

They’re everything you’re looking for. The fake profiles show very good-looking men or women, who are also looking for a serious relationship. The conversation will always be flowing. They’ll send good morning and good night texts, selfies, pictures at local landmarks, even shots of their “homecooked dinners.” After a few weeks, they might start using pet names for you or even profess their love. If they get too lovey too quick, throw up a red flag.

Meeting up and video chats aren’t an option. They might use excuses about being too busy to meet in person, usually because of work. Or they’ll say they’re too shy to video chat, and might even pull on your heartstrings by citing a past bad relationship. But if you’ve been talking to someone for weeks and have yet to lay eyes on them, you should be cautious.

They talk a lot about money. Actors in this scam will present themselves as super-wealthy and will talk about spending thousands of dollars like it’s nothing. Reminder: Even if they don’t ask for your private information, any type of talk about your finances with someone you haven’t met is always a red flag.

You’re told about deals that are too good to be true. They’ll convince you that you can have what they have – all you have to do is try out their investment plan. “Trust me,” they’ll say, “My uncle is an expert in crypto and taught me everything they know!” Get rich fast schemes are almost always just that – schemes.

Got scammed? What to do next

Remember, scammers are opportunists and online daters a prime target for their shady schemes. You download a dating app with dreams of opening up and finding your person – and scammers look to take advantage of that vulnerability.

So if you find yourself a victim of a scam, try not to judge yourself. You did something brave by putting yourself out there. The blame is entirely on the scammer.

Now, check out this article on our Help Desk for steps you can take if you need direction after being scammed.

How CMB finds and blocks scammers

Dating should never feel scary – at least not for reasons like this. That’s why we’re working overtime to keep our community safe from scammers.

We use AI programs dedicated to sorting out scammers. Plus, we have an Approval Team that reviews new profiles and checks photos and schools for apparent fakes. If someone happens to get through this system and creates a profile, then we rely on savvy daters like you to be another line of defense.

If you think you’ve come across or matched with a scammer, please report them immediately. By reporting a scammer, you’re preventing them from taking advantage of someone else in the future. And don’t worry – reporting is totally anonymous.

Once reported, we investigate, then ban the profile if appropriate. We’ll then alert our Approval Team not to approve anyone with that user’s information or photos moving forward.

We know this is a lot of information to take in. But we want to give you all of the tools you need to protect yourself. That way you can actually enjoy online dating and find what you’re looking for: a real, lasting relationship (not an empty bank account).

Chat messages

5 Tips to Take Your Chats to the Next Level

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A note from David Osteen, in-house data scientist at CMB

Picture this: You open your Coffee Meets Bagel app and see you’ve made a new connection!

First comes that rush of exhilaration: you’re imagining all of the rom-com scenarios that are sure to unfold. But then, your brain busts in with a dose of negativity. Remember those matches that fizzled out with lackluster, forgettable messages?

As a data scientist at Coffee Meets Bagel, I’ve seen too many chats meet an untimely end due to an inability to convert a match into a fun, meaningful conversation. So, what gives? Why do some chats sizzle and other chats fizzle?

My team and I started looking into some of the chat data to answer this question. Here are my insider tips for turning your chats into conversations that lead to great dates.

1. Check Small Talk at the Door

Let’s be real, no one enjoys small talk. You grin and bear it at office Christmas parties. Why should you willingly engage in it when it comes to dating? Your time is more valuable than that.

Start your chat off with a bang by asking a question you genuinely want to hear the answer to. Say you’re a comic fanatic, ask who they think the best Avenger character is and share yours too. (It’s Captain Marvel, obviously.)

Feel weird about diving right into a chat with a question? Make sure to fill out your Icebreakers in your profile so we can help get things going. 

Here are some other questions to try out:

💬 What book are you reading?

💬 Have you picked up any new hobbies lately?

💬 What video games are currently obsessed with? (We should play together!)

Make sure you provide your own answer to your question, too, to help spark conversation. And, while my examples are a good start, feel free to get creative.

2. Don’t Wait to Break the Ice

If someone’s profile is interesting enough to earn your “like,” why wait to have a conversation? Procrastination may or may not be your middle name, but that won’t fly here.

It’s best to strike while the iron — or should I say bagel — is hot. Chats started on Coffee Meets Bagel within three hours of matching are 52% more likely to get a response!

Once you get rolling, don’t drag it out. Nothing kills conversation momentum quite like a reply that takes 16 hours. By that point, you don’t even remember what you were talking about without rereading past messages.

And plus, if conversation is flowing and you’re both feeling a spark, you’re that much closer to a great first date.

3. Don’t Be Scared to Make the First Move

For the love of all that is good, don’t let outdated, cliche dating rules lead you astray.

Guys should make the first move? Nope. You liked them first, so now it’s their turn? Forget it. Initiating the conversation gives away your power? Absolutely not!

My advice here is very simple but also very important: It’s just a chat. Don’t put so much pressure on it.

Reaching out first isn’t equivalent to a marriage proposal, it just means that you matched and would like to know more — it’s as simple as that. If you allow those misguided notions to dictate your dating life, you might miss out on promising opportunities.

4. Give Phone Calls a Chance

In today’s day and age, most of us freeze up when our phone actually rings. But when it comes to getting to know someone, a good ol’ fashioned phone call is invaluable.

That’s right, I’m suggesting that you pick up the phone, dial an actual number and talk on the phone like it’s 2005. Not only will you give your poor thumbs a break (hello, carpal tunnel!) but a phone call is a great change of pace. It can make you stand out and give you a better read on someone.

With online chatting and texting, people have time to craft the perfect, cool response. But, you can’t really get a feel for someone’s personality until you have a real life conversation. Chatting on the phone will reduce the chances you’ll be surprised within the first five minutes of meeting a bagel they just aren’t what you thought they’d be.

5. Take the Next Step or Wrap It Up

After a few exchanges, you should have a pretty good idea of whether you’d like to take this conversation face-to-face. And what better way to do that than with a virtual first date?

I know, virtual dates are a new concept we’ve all had to embrace thanks to our new world full of social distancing. But hear me out, because they have their perks:

💜 All you need is your laptop and boom – you can get to know someone from the comfort of your own home. No pants required (Just kidding, I insist you should wear pants.)

💜 It’s a safe and low-commitment way to get to know someone outside of a chat. Sometimes you can’t discover that spark until you have face-to-face interaction (even if it’s technically virtual). 

💜 You can try out new date ideas that you normally wouldn’t –  from virtual cooking classes to streaming an opera to playing virtual questionnaire games together. 

And here’s another reason to give virtual dates a chance: Everyone is new to this. We’re all fumbling and figuring it out together. Don’t believe me? We polled CMB daters and found out more than 80% of our Daters are open to virtual dates!

So if you want to have a virtual meetup with your bagel, don’t overthink it — just ask! This calls back to not putting so much pressure on the situation. If they say yes, congrats! If they say no, it’s all good — at least they were honest and didn’t waste your time with a date that would lead to nothing.

On the flip side, if you’ve been chatting but the spark isn’t happening, be honest and respectfully end the conversation. And I can’t stress this enough: don’t ghost!

Here are some ways to end a lackluster chat or politely decline an invite to meet:

💬 “I enjoyed chatting but I don’t think we’re a good fit. Thanks for the conversation and I hope you meet your right match!”

💬 “I enjoyed our convo but I don’t feel the connection. It was great meeting you and good luck with future bagels!”

Bonus: Keep an Eye Out for Scams

You’re here to meet people and have a good time, so don’t let the scammers of the world get in your way. While CMB does have an internal tool that runs 24/7 to combat scammers, it isn’t perfect (yet).

So, protect yourself, and your identity, by keeping personal information like phone numbers and email addresses to yourself until you are 100% comfortable.

Trust your gut and be aware of suspicious behavior, like someone pushing you to meet before you’re ready or asking for money. If it looks like a scam and walks like a scam… you get the picture. Report these people right away.

For more info on online dating safety, be sure to peek at our guide: “Online Dating Safety Tips: 5 Ways to Spot a Scammer.”

Time to Get Chatty

Now that you’re armed with these pro tips, it’s time to put them to the test and get to chatting with your matches! Every time you match with a bagel, a new convo with an icebreaker will appear in “Chats.” To get there, open your app and simply tap “Chats” in the bottom right corner.

Chatting isn’t meant to be hard, you just have to get out of your own head and be genuine. Keep my tips in mind and you’re sure to find yourself lost in conversation without breaking a sweat. Happy matching!

 

Feeling a meaningful conversation? Download the app now on iOS or Android if you haven’t already.

 

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Online Dating Safety Tips: 5 Ways to Spot a Scammer

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A note from Brenda Guardado, head of customer experience

Finding a good date used to be at the top of my “things I dread” list, right after public speaking and queuing at the bank. So, when apps like Coffee Meets Bagel came onto the scene, I was beyond relieved. I didn’t have to frequent loud bars, or try to recreate that rom-com scene where the woman bumps into a hunk at a supermarket and the 99-cent-oranges display goes flying.

But while coming across a good date got easier, so did coming across a less savory type: scammers.

Now as the head of customer experience at Coffee Meets Bagel, I’ve heard the happily-ever-after stories and the I-fell-for-a-scam stories. And while CMB does have technology in place to prevent scammers from joining in the first place, we can’t catch all of them by ourselves (yet).

So before you can star in your own dating app success story, check out my tips on how to stay safe.

Quick Online Dating Safety Tips

Buckle up! Safety, first. Before we hop into the five signs your match might be a scammer, check out these quick tips.

  • Never send money, gift cards, or account info to matches — especially if you haven’t met them in person.
  • Keep your exact workplace and address a secret until you’ve met in person and have built trust over time. (Some experts advise also keeping your last name private until after your first date.)
  • Tell your friends or family about when & where you’re meeting a match for the first time. Provide your own transportation, and always meet in a safe, public place, such as a coffee shop.

And, most importantly, if you ever feel uncomfortable or harassed when chatting with a match, stop talking to them and report them on the app. Then, block them from other messaging services if applicable. If you’re already on a date, leave immediately. Dating should never feel scary.

Signs Your Match Might Be a Scammer

Now that we’ve taken care of the crucial safety tips, you’re all set! Well, almost. I want you to spend time on matches who matter on CMB, not scammers. Here’s how to spot if your match is a scammer before you get involved.

1. They Go From 0-100

Oftentimes, scammers use artful tactics to try and sweep you off your feet. They might shower you with compliments or use flowery, romantic language right off the bat. They might give you a wholesome Disney-eqsue monologue about how they’re “just looking for love,” and “U the one 4 me, babe.” But I know you’re smarter than that, so you’ll see your match moving too fast as a red flag.

Another red flag: They’ll want to take things off the app and start texting, calling, or using other messaging apps (such as Kik, WhatsApp, or WeChat) ASAP. To cut to the chase, they may even include this contact info in their bio.

2. Their Stories Pull on Your Heartstrings

Gone are the days when all scammers were Nigerian princes. Nowadays, they’re architects, oil-rig engineers, geologists, make-up artists, nurses, and more. But one of the most common careers scammers claim to have is that of a soldier, or any career related to the military. And oftentimes they are oh-so-conveniently stationed far overseas where they can’t meet you in person.

But their real job title? A sly scammer. They may even claim to be religious (a tactic used for inspiring trust), or tell you a sob story: they’re a recent widow and their partner has passed in a tragic accident. Or, perhaps they have a sick child or parent they care for. While these unfortunate circumstances may be true for a small portion of singles involved in online dating, one of the telltale signs you’ve matched with a scammer doesn’t come until later — when they ask for your money.

3. They’re Just Too Good to Be True

If your match has profile photos that belong in a magazine catalogue, you’ve either met a model, or a scammer. And while both exist in real life (models aren’t Bigfoot, after all), it would be very unlikely for a real person not to have any casual, non-professional photos in their profile pic lineup.

In short, if your match has too-good-to-be-true photos, your match may indeed be too good to be true. But just because your match is in sweatpants in their pic (which, to be clear, is not a good dating photo best practice) doesn’t mean you’re in the clear.

Take note of other profile/photo inconsistencies. For example, if their profile says they’re 32, but they look only 22 in their picture, that’s a red flag. Likewise, if their profile claims they have a high level of education, but their grammar is disjointed, something might be up.

4. Meeting in Person Isn’t an Option

We know that the most meaningful connections happen face-to-face, so on Coffee Meets Bagel, we encourage members to meet in person. So if your match isn’t keen on meeting in real life, you should raise an eyebrow.

One of the most common excuses scammers use to avoid meeting in person is claiming that they work abroad. And if they won’t even agree to chat on the phone, you should hear alarm bells.

One way you can combat catfishing — someone pretending to be someone they aren’t online — is by fact-checking. Try running a Google reverse image search to check if they have multiple profiles under different names or with different info. Some scammers may also steal photos from influencers, low-profile celebrities, or stock sources.

5. They Ask for Money, Gift Cards, or Account Info

Lastly, and most importantly, if your match asks you for money, gift cards, or your account information, stop all communication immediately. It is extremely likely this person is a scammer.

But, it isn’t always clear right away. Many scammers will play the long-game by trying to build trust with you over time. Then, suddenly, there’s an “emergency,” and they need money quickly. Here’s a few types of fake emergencies they may claim to have:

  • They were robbed and need money
  • They have to book a last-minute business trip
  • They need a loan
  • They or their family member has a medical emergency

Sometimes, scammers may also ask for gift cards, such as an iTunes gift card. But, you should never trust a match who claims they need anything from you but your time and words, even if they promise to pay you back.

Another way a scammer might try to steal from you is less direct: by gaining access to your accounts. While some may directly ask you for your account info, routing numbers, social security number, or driver’s license info, others may be more sneaky.

If you match asks you strangely specific personal questions about old addresses, your pets’ names, or schools you’ve attended, be cautious. They could be trying to gain access to your accounts by resetting your passwords via security question answers.

How to Report a Match on CMB

If you think you’ve come across or matched with a scammer, or if your match has violated our terms of service, please report them. By reporting a scammer, you’re preventing them from scamming other lovely bagels on our app in the future.

To report a bagel in Suggested, simply tap on the flag icon in their profile. To report a bagel in Discover, submit a request.

 

 

Ready to meet someone special? Download Coffee Meets Bagel on iOS or Android.

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Run Date Festival 2018 – A CMB Experience

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On February 11th, 2018, Coffee Meets Bagel hosted Asia’s largest singles running event at Hong Kong Science Park in Hong Kong, with over 1,500+ participants! The 5km run involved a group warm up with ice breaker activities, two obstacle courses that could only be done in pairs, and some awesome date activities like latte making classes and dinner for two as rewards.
So you might be wondering…why did a dating app organize Run Date 2018? At Coffee Meets Bagel, we want to create authentic connections for this generation in all possible ways. We didn’t want to be limited by the online world. We thought hard: how can we bring more playfulness and fun to dating? What if we create in-person opportunities for people to have fun and make new connections – not in an awkward networking event kind of way – but through experiencing new things that you can actually enjoy.
This is why we decided to launch CMB Experiences – unique, real-world events and spaces where people can step offline and engage in a fun, novel, delightful experience together that inspires them to share and connect authentically with someone new! Run Date Festival in Hong Kong was the first CMB Experience of many to come. This coming May, we will host our second CMB Experience — Camp Meets Bagel, a summer sleep-away camp for grown ups that will take place in New York.
We hope that through these shared experiences we can create a sense of relatedness, camaraderie and belonging for everyone! We are excited to organize a series of CMB Experiences that will make great memories for you and your friends, foster great new friendships, and maybe spark some romance as well.

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Singles & Valentine’s Day

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February 14th is upon us! What are singles doing for Valentine’s Day this year? We surveyed over 650 CMBers around the world to determine the latest dating trends and stats around the holiday synonymous with love, and here’s what we found…
CMB Valentine's Day 2018

CMB Year in Review: Farewell 2017, Hello 2018! [Asia]

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Happy New Year, Bagels! We hope you rang in the New Year in style (…and maybe even with a Bagel…), but before we get ahead of ourselves let’s bid one last farewell to 2017 by looking back at what happened on CMB!

We crunched some numbers to find out which cities took the crown for most LIKED to most ACTIVE in 2017, and here’s what we found:

CMB 2017: Year in Review Asia

We also took an even closer look at some of our top cities in the Asia! Find out how many introductions were made and messages sent in each city here:

Hong Kong | Singapore 

Cheers, Bagels! Let’s make 2018 a year to remember ;)

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CMB Year in Review: Farewell 2017, Hello 2018!

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Happy New Year, Bagels! We hope you rang in the New Year in style (…and maybe even with a Bagel…), but before we get ahead of ourselves let’s bid one last farewell to 2017 by looking back at what happened on CMB!
We crunched some numbers to find out which cities took the crown for most LIKED to most ACTIVE in 2017, and here’s what we found:
CMB 2017: United States
We also took an even closer look at some of our top cities in the US! Find out how many introductions were made and messages sent in each city here:
San Francisco | New York | Los Angeles | Boston | Washington D.C. | Chicago
Cheers, Bagels! Let’s make 2018 a year to remember ;)

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Collegiate Dating Trends in Los Angeles

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There are many top-ranked colleges in the Los Angeles area, but how do they stack up when it comes to the dating scene?
We analyzed more than 30,000 profiles of singles from some of the top colleges in Los Angeles to uncover which schools have the most attractive, the pickiest, the most assertive, the chattiest singles and more!
The complete Los Angeles rankings can be found below!2016 Collegiate Dating Trends in LA by CMB

Collegiate Dating Trends in Dallas

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There are many top-ranked colleges in the Dallas area, but how do they stack up when it comes to the dating scene?
We analyzed more than 10,000 profiles of singles from some of the top colleges in Dallas to uncover which schools have the most attractive, the pickiest, the most assertive, the chattiest singles and more!
The complete Dallas rankings can be found below!
2016 Collegiate Dating Trends in Dallas by CMB

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