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Five Creative & (almost!) Free Date Ideas

August 13, 2014/in Date Ideas /by Guest Blogger

The art of the first date is a fragile endeavor, and few people embark upon it with success.
First impressions matter, and there are a million factors that can make-or-break an initial meet up. If you’re looking to solidify a connection, it’s important to pick an environment and activity that will allow both of you to be yourselves—relaxed and at ease.
I’ll be honest: I hate the typical meal-or-coffee thing. It’s too much pressure. I feel stressed to be consistently witty and charming, and to balance an equal measure of talking about myself with asking questions. Can you tell I’m an over-thinker? That leads to awkwardness, which leads to more over-thinking, which leads to more nerves. And on, and on, and on. It’s a vicious cycle.
Not to mention, if you’ve been cruising the dating scene for a while, there’s a good chance you’re hurting for cash. When you’re looking to make a good impression, it can be daunting to plan a date on a budget.
Don’t you worry, though, Grasshopper. Here are five great options for a creative and fun experience that won’t burn a hole through your wallet.

1. Breakfast (or Brunch!)

Ok, maybe it seems like I’m reneging on my “no-meals” rule. I promise, I’m not. Breakfast is the exception.
I like breakfast dates for several reasons. For one, it’s fun. Who doesn’t love breakfast? It’s early, so you’re probably awake and refreshed—rather than bogged down from a day full of work and meetings. If possible, choose a place with a nice outdoor patio. Fresh air is calming, and you can always fall back on people-watching when conversation lulls.
Plus, breakfast is a pretty accommodating meal for people with dietary restrictions. Most breakfast spots have great options for vegetarians and those sensitive to gluten. And to top it off, breakfast is generally more budget-friendly than other meals.
Word to the wise: Only choose a breakfast date if you’re both morning people. I’ve heard disaster stories of anti-morning folks attempting this. Needless to say, it was a flop. If your bodies natural rhythms aren’t going to cooperate, avoid this at all costs.

2. Improv

 Take to the interwebs and do a quick Yelp search for a local improv show in your town. If you do your research, you should be able to find something free, or less than a general admission movie ticket.
I can personally vouch for this date. I went to a show with a guy I had almost no chemistry with, and the performer were—ahem—not the world’s best talent. Regardless, we had a blast. It took the pressure off of us and allowed us to connect through laughter (because improv is still enjoyable when the performers blow it!)
Word to the wise: Most shows have some sort of appropriateness rating available. Try to avoid anything over PG-13. Those kinds of jokes can be too much for a first date.

3. Farmers Market

One thing I dislike about the typical meal date is being glued to my seat. When I am nervous, I am fidgety.
The nice thing about heading to a local farmers market is the ability to stay moving, which releases all those jitters. There is a ton to see and explore, and endless possibilities for conversation starters. It’s also a great opportunity to try new things together, and many farmers markets have some kind of music or live entertainment. Boom.
Plus, who doesn’t like supporting their local community?
Word to the wise: This is an especially great first date if you already attend your farmers market regularly and know a few vendors. Having established friendships and knowing who has the best produce in your neighborhood will seem super charming.

 4. Dollar Movie Theater (Mystery Science Theater Style)

Now, before you assume this is tacky—let me explain. Movie dates can be uncomfortable, because you’re sitting next to a stranger in silence for at least two hours. That’s fine if the movie turns out to be good. But if the movie blows, it’s a recipe for disaster.
Instead, pick out a show together at the local dollar theater. Try to pick something that looks particularly awful, that’s also been out for quite some time. You want the theater as empty as possible.
Then, during the film, you both have freedom to talk. You can crack jokes and criticize the acting all you want. The lighthearted experience is a great means to feel comfortable around each other, and build an actual bond.
Word to the wise: This might not be the best option for two introverts, or for those folks who very passionately hold an anti-talking-in-movies policy.

 5. Geocaching

It’s time for a treasure hunt! What could be better for a first date than a little bit of teamwork and adventure?
If you’re unfamiliar with geocaching, let me explain: Geocaching in a real-life treasure hunt. Around the world, there are millions (yes, millions!) of active geocache locations. Participants mark the coordinates of hidden treasure using a GPS device, and everyone who visits a cache has the opportunity to take something and leave something behind. (To be fair, be prepared to leave something that is of equal/greater value to that which you take.)
If you have a smartphone, there are plenty of great geocaching apps available for download. These will help you pick an adventure, navigate to your destination, and give you clues to help you figure out where the treasure is hiding.
The best part? Every cache has a logbook for you and your date to sign—leaving a legacy of your first date. (Imagine coming back a year later and re-signing!)
Word to the wise: Warn your date to wear comfortable clothes and good shoes. These adventures can lead you to unexpected places. Be prepared.
(For more information, visit the official Geocaching website.)

Did you enjoy this post? Why not check out another post by Erika, on setting expectations in a new relationship, or visiting her blog at The Trees Will Clap. (And don’t forget to share it on Facebook!)

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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PLUR, rave, dating, peace, love, unity, respect

How Raving & PLUR Changed My Perspective On Dating

July 15, 2014/in Dating for Men /by Guest Blogger

The following article is a guest post, courtesy of Bronson Farr

Raving isn’t exactly the first thing that comes to mind when you think about going out on a date. In fact, my ideal first date actually entails going out for milkshakes at my favorite diner by the beach followed by taking a stroll on the sand while watching the sun set.
As a heterosexual male in his early 20’s living in the 21st Century, my idea of dating looks something like this:

  1. Find a VERY pretty girl.
  2. Get VERY pretty girl’s number.
  3. Ask her out on a date.
  4. Repeat steps 1-3 with another VERY pretty girl if rejected.
  5. Ask VERY pretty girl on a second date.
  6. TIME TO PURSUE THAT if there is chemistry.
  7. Ask VERY pretty girl to be my girlfriend when we are comfortable enough with each other.
  8. Yay relationship* (*relationships come along with arguments and spending a lot of money).
  9. Things don’t work out? Repeat steps 1-8 with a different VERY pretty girl.
  10. Things work out. Pop the question and tie the knot.

As you can see, this is a pretty linear model as to what I thought dating was about, which pretty much boils down to getting the girl of my dreams, falling in love with her, and living happily ever after with our new family. But my whole perspective on dating changed after attending this year’s Electric Daisy Carnival in Las Vegas.
The Electric Daisy Carnival (EDC) in Las Vegas is considered to be the largest rave out on the West Coast…and by God did it live up to expectation.
I saw some of my favorite artists such as Calvin Harris and Chromeo, made kandi bracelets and traded them with other people, making friends in the process; and I even got the chance to see one of my childhood friends. Not only that, but the entire Las Vegas Speedway was covered in lights, giant ferris wheels and other colorful carnival rides lit up the night sky, and fellow ravers were giving each other light shows with their customized LED gloves (and did I mention that there were a ton of lights around?)

PlUR, Calvin Harris, rave, dating, EDM, Peace, Love, Unity, Respect

Calvin Harris spinning at EDC Las Vegas 2014

The thing that stuck out the most to me, however, was this notion of “PLUR” that was floating around the festival grounds. A new acquaintance, who was part of my rave group, explained to me that this acronym is the reason why everyone at an electronic dance music (EDM) concert or festival is super friendly. Now I am fairly new to the rave scence, having only gone to two other performances prior to EDC, and didn’t have a clue as to what PLUR was.

SO WHAT IS PLUR?

For those of you who don’t know, PLUR stands for Peace, Love, Unity, and Respect. This is the creed that ravers live by and can be seen through their smiles, hugs, and even a special handshake.
The phrase got it’s start from DJ Frankie Bones who broke up a fight at a rave in 1991 in New York saying, ““You better start showing some Peace, Love and Unity, or I will break your $%^ing faces” (via JoJo Electro). The “respect” portion was added in not too long after.
PLUR, Dating, PLUR, definition, peace, love, unity, respect
While the words that come together to form PLUR are pretty self explanatory, there is actually a lot more to it. Let’s break it down to get a better understanding(via Peace & Loveism):

  • Peace – Letting go of fear and living at peace with oneself, one another, and the planet for a greater good
  • Love – As one learns to love oneself, one is able to love everyone else unconditionally
  • Unity – A mutual, corporate bond is formed resulting from the love and peace experienced with one another
  • Respect – Because of peace love and unity, one can accept others regardless of their beliefs or background

Taking a step back you can see this is a great motto to practice at concerts and festivals. And I’ve personally seen it in action. My first EDC was filled with countless high fives, warm hugs, and people even checking up on me when I wasn’t feeling too well and  lying on the ground
But what if I told you that PLUR isn’t just for EDM fans, that it can exist without all of electronic music and the kandi kids in the rave scene?

RAVING & DATING?

Going back to my original line of thinking when it comes to dating… it’s not always about pursuing the “happily ever after” life. Every relationship needs some form of peace, love, unity, and respect.
“But, Bronson, I’m already in a loving relationship already filled with peace, love, unity, and respect! Should I change my entire lifestyle to accommodate PLUR?”
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! I’m not saying that you should change your lifestyle to accommodate this movement. You don’t need to go to the next EDM festival nearest you and give out as many hugs as you can, and you don’t need to trade beaded bracelets to signify your respect with another person. My point is that PLUR isn’t just for the ravers, it’s for everyone.
Every relationship needs peace, or else both persons would just be either way too pissed off or getting into shouting arguments about who’s the better cook. Relationships need love or else there would be no romance that would spice things up a bit. This also includes tough love that isn’t always happy, but still shows that you care for each other. Couples need unity in order to make big decisions together such as tying the knot or moving in together. And most importantly, every relationship requires respect. That means respecting each other’s boundaries, and being sure not to step over them.
PLUR, heart, kandi, rave, dating, peace, love, unity, respect
PLUR is a universal concept that everyone can pick up on. You might even be putting it to practice in your relationship and not even know it, and that’s okay. PLUR is similar to the notion of “give and take”. When it comes dating, a single person can’t have everything his/her way, it’s more of a two way street where trade happens. The two people must find a balance so that their relationship needs are met, while still meeting their personal wants/needs.

IN CONCLUSION…

Before I finish I would like to note that there is talk amongst some older and more experienced ravers about how the PLUR movement, more specifically the main concept of PLUR, is dying within the rave scene. Personally, I don’t see how it is dying seeing as how my experience at EDC showed me that it was alive and well. But at the same time, I see a chance for this movement to stay alive through the people and couples who choose to practice it in their lives.
About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Your date is underdressed. #oopsies

Eight Awkward Online Dating Moments And How to Get Out Of Them

July 12, 2013/in Funny & Videos /by CMB

We’ve all been there… Here’s a few of the best online dating awkward moments:

1. The Neighbor Make-Out Sesh

Nextdoor Make-out?
You’re on a lunch date and things are going smoothly. Suddenly the couple next to you starts making out passionately. You’re suddenly filled with awkwardness and doubt. Should you be making out too? Is this normal in a daytime cafe? Your date has noticed too and now she’s deep in thought about it as well. You’ve just met…you can’t be thinking about making out yet!
OR MAYBE YOU CAN! The best solution? Outshine your neighbors with your own mid-day make-out.

2. The “I thought this was just going to be a hug” goodbye

OH GOD HE'S GOING FOR A KISS

You’ve had a very nice first date. He was an absolute gentleman and damn cute as well. On saying goodbye, you lean in for a ‘see you later’ hug, only to see him closing his eyes and puckering his lips! He’s going for a kiss! What do you do in a situation like this? Should you reciprocate or dodge? Think quickly, you only have a split second!

Our answer? Skip first base! Go for the full home-run.

 

3. The I-think-I-kinda-know-you hello.

The "I already know you" hello

You’ve spent two hours picking out your outfit for the night. You have thought out every possible conversation and you are sure that you are ready to rock this date. Suddenly the unthinkable happens. When you meet your date, you realize that he was that guy in your finance class. You know, the one who you saw everywhere but never really talked to. THAT ONE GUY. You just went from confident to completely uncomfortable.

Best Choice? Get to REALLY know them. *wink*

4. The “Who are you again?”

The "Who are you?"

You’re halfway through a great date. The conversation has been phenomenal; she shares all the same interests as you and even had a dog of the same breed as yours. It could not be a better match. You open your mouth to say something, but your brain fails you! What’s her name!? You don’t know! What do you do?

We know what we would do. Use nicknames like Honey-Bear, Sugar-Booger, and Frank.

 

5. The surprise third-wheel.

The surprise third wheel

You’re on a first date at the park and suddenly an old friend comes up to you. You haven’t seen her in years! She joins right in the conversation and asks how you know your date. How do you know him? Do you say it’s a date? Will that be uncomfortable? If you say he’s just a friend, is that friendzoning? How do you make it not awkward while still keeping the date in play?

Ask her to join in! #threeway #AWWWWYEEEAH

 

6. The dress code violation.

The Dress code violator

You’re meeting up with your date for a classy wine-and-candlelight dinner. You’ve put time into your look and you look damn fine. You show up at your arranged meeting place only to find your date completely under dressed. We’re not talking like he wore a sweater instead of a blazer, but like, he wore a brotank to a five-star. Who is this guy? Do you still go to dinner?

 Our style tips? You guys will still match if you’re both undressed *wink*

 

7. The declined credit card.

The declined credit card
You’ve finished your meals and are ready to leave for the theater when suddenly the waiter comes back to the table and informs you that your credit card was just declined. It’s the only card in your wallet and you didn’t bring cash. Should you ask your date to pay for you? Can you really pay off your bill by cleaning dishes? Will the waiter still want a tip?
If you never intend to pay, you can never be too poor! Just dine ‘n dash at every meal!

8. The lack of conversation.

The 'nothing to talk about' date
It’s a nice day out. Your food has been delicious. Your date is cute. Even your hair looks good today. Everything is great, but you can’t think of a single thing to say to your date. Worst part? He has nothing to say either. You both just sit there, uncomfortably sipping your orange mocha frappuccinos and avoiding eye contact. You’ve been racking your brains but no good question has come up. Should you just say the first thing you can think of? Should you just wait for him to say something? Maybe you should just get up and leave? Is there anything you can do?
If you can’t think of anything to say to your date, then talk to someone else. Our personal favorite? SIRI. “Siri, why is my date looking at me awkwardly?”

March 12, 2012/in Uncategorized /by CMB

I love the fact that after typing in some initial info, you sit back and have people brought to you. It takes the work out of it, which to me, would be the whole point of internet dating/meeting. I have played with a couple of online sites, but the time you need to invest…you could be out there in realtime having fun.” -Bagel J

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