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Five Texting Mistakes That I’ve Made and Don’t Want You to Make

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Online dating can be tricky, especially when your first medium of communication is over messaging.  Here are some online dating tips for men and women on how not to screw up your chances at landing that first date.  Or if you’ve already made it to the first date, congratulations!  Now to safely text your way to the second.
1. Being too forward
It’s a  fact: Texting lacks the subtle nuances of face-to-face conversation.  Unfortunately this causes two major problems: 1) What you text is up to the receiver’s interpretation and 2) You can’t read what the other person is thinking.   It’s good to assert your feelings, but sometimes it can come off too strong over text, especially if you aren’t sure how the other person is feeling.  Your best bet is to keep things light and easy until you meet.

texting mistake, wtf autocorrect

No thanks bro


2. TMI
The concept of TMI, or “too much information” is very similar to that person who tweets about the  extremely ordinary oatmeal they’re eating for breakfast or posts on Facebook about the number of  snotty tears they’ve shed and ice cream cartons consumed in post-break up aftermath.  When I ask you what you did today, I don’t need to know EVERYTHING you did.  A little bit of mystery can add a lot.
tmi, texting mistake

Just No


3.  Statements vs. Questions
Conversation is a two way street.  Both parties need to give or take in order to keep things flowing naturally.  Not asking questions can make you seem self-absorbed, disinterested, or socially awkward at the worst.   For example, I like _____” not the best way to start a conversation.  At least add a “how about you?” to open it up to the other person.
4. One Word Answers
If you’re looking to kill a conversation look no further than one-word answers!  We use words like K, lol, yeah, or even the mundane yes or no when we have nothing better to say (Or when you’re not interested and trying to fade someone out).   But, if you’re actually interested, it’s better to keep these words at a minimum.  When you can’t think of anything else to say, try changing the subject or asking a question.
one word texts, texting mistake
5.  Not Replying… FOR DAYS
This one’s my favorite.  Yes, people are busy and can’t reply to texts, but after a few days it just starts getting ridiculous.  Imagine yourself in mid-conversation with a cute guy or girl, when suddenly they turn around and ignore you for the next two days or god knows when.  In a nut shell it feels something like this and that’s not fun.   So, if you’re a caring, kind-hearted person who doesn’t want the girl or guy you like to experience emotional anguish/psychotic thoughts you should reply to texts on time or at least within a day.
texting mistake, wtf autocorrect, not texting back

Um…what?


 
Are you guilty of these texting mistakes?  Make sure to check out our article on what it’s like waiting for a text!
 
 
 
 
 

Don’t lead with your abs: 5 common mistakes to avoid on your online dating profile

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Hey Bagels! As the Chief Marketing Officer at Coffee Meets Bagel, I see a lot of male profile pictures.  To be honest, they aren’t always the best. So guys of Coffee Meets Bagel, follow these 5 important online dating tips to when choosing your photos and it will quickly turn your profile into a LIKE from a Pass!
1. No shirtless pictures
Shirtless picture
Just because it worked for Bruce Lee, it doesn’t mean that it works for you. Believe it or not, we can still tell you work out with a shirt on.
2. No selfies
Picture2
Regardless whether you are shirtless or not, selfies are just a don’t.  We will think that all you do is sit at home and snap pictures of yourself on your mobile device, and it doesn’t convince us that you are an interesting or adventurous guy.
3. Don’t include other girls in the picture
Picture3
We obviously don’t mind that you have female friends, but sometimes we can’t tell if she your sister or your ex-girlfriend.  So please learn to use the “crop” feature on your phone or photo editor.
4. Resist holding a baby in a picture
Picture4
We may think babies are cute, but we have no way of knowing who the father is. Is it your son or your nephew? We have no idea and we’d rather not guess. If you want to make us think you’re cute: try posing with your dog instead!
5. No group shots, sunglasses, baseball caps

boys-night-out
Don’t get us wrong: we love that you are social and have friends. We love your Ray-Ban Aviators as much as you do. But when you post multiple pictures of yourself and your ten closest dude friends, or your face covered up, we just can’t tell which one you are and what you look like.
And finally, SMILE!
Picture11
That’s not a don’t – that’s a DO! Girls are attracted to happy, excited & positive guys so save your serious professional shots for your LinkedIn profile. A picture of your with a smile conveys that you are warm, friendly and open to meeting you new people – which is exactly what Coffee Meets Bagel is about!
 

Top 6 Ways To Text Your Bagel

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Valentine’s Day Bonus! Ever have a hard time coming up with a good first text? You’re not the only one! Try emulating these smooth-talking Bagels. Six creative first texts that you wish you thought of first.
 
Most Honest
Bagel A: “Whats up! I don’t care you passed I just want one convo. I’m actually in Israel right now, you ever been??”
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Most Creative
Bagel J: “Like Oreo for milk, will you be bagel for my coffee?”
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Most Mistaken
Bagel D: “I missed a comma and for a second thought you liked to eat puppies. “Wow such tactless honestly!” Great smile!”
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Most Suggestive
Bagel S: “Hey! I like red wine and getting sweaty too! Mostly through Bikram Yoga…”
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Most Poetic
Bagel R: “Hey! I’m Ray. My birthday is in May and I like to play. Want to grab a drink some day? I hope you don’t say nay.”
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Most Bold
Bagel J: “This might be a weird question, but did I make out with you at a penthouse party last New Year’s?”
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Ms. Singlefied

Sunday Spotlight #7: Yue Xu

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We bring back the Sunday Spotlight Series with Yue Xu (a.k.a. Ms. Singlefied), an expert dating advisor for men and the founder of the dating blog Singlefied.com. She shares with CMB members the three biggest dating success secrets (for both men and women) she has observed over her years of experience as a dating coach! Check out her video here.
To keep up with her latest & greatest, follow Yue on tweeter @SinglefiedYue and Youtube MissSinglefied.

CMB Men's Series: How to Score a 2nd Date

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CMB Men’s Series is original content dedicated to (confused) men and dating in the city.
Guys typically know within 30 seconds of meeting a girl whether she is compatible and has long term potential. However, just because it’s easy for us to recognize potential, it doesn’t mean that it’s easy to convince the date that we’re worth their time.
Here are 4 essential steps to take on a first date that will help you land a 2nd.
1. Plan the Proper First Date
Choose somewhere you are familiar with, a place where you may know the owners or the best dishes to order. The goal of the first date is to get to know each other, so let her see you in your most comfortable environment.
Less is more!  No need for pre-dinner drinks, dinner, post-dinner drinks, Broadway Show..etc. She’s not getting  a realistic perception of you if you put on a production.  And guess what? If you continue to see each other, she will continue to keep expectations high.
Keep it simple.  82% of women polled in CMB’s survey said that they typically go to a coffee shop or bar on a first date. Dating on a budget in NYC? Click here for our hand picked pocket friendly date ideas that will still impress your lady.
Keep a 3 hour time limit. The success of a date doesn’t depend on duration. Having a time pressure will motivate you to get to know your date within that time period, and may leave her wanting more.
Video courtesy of Ms. Singlefied. Visit her at singlefied.com or @singlefiedyue.
2. Ask Her Questions
Obvious fact of the day: women like to talk.  Studies have shown that women communicate more verbally then men.  So naturally it’s easy to let the conversation become one-sided, but don’t let it turn into an interrogation where she’s peppering you with questions.  Take the lead and engage her with questions that show your genuine interest in who she is, where she comes from, and what her values are.
3. Pick Up the Tab

Splitting the bill, or going ‘Dutch’, might make sense to some.  You hardly know each other, the economy stinks, and she has a job. But sorry guys, if you don’t make an effort to pick up the tab, there may not be a 2nd date. Want proof?
CMB’s survey showed that 87%! of women either feel they should never pay on a first date or secretly hope the guy would pay the full bill. Chivalry, and more importantly the expectation of chivalry, is very much still alive.
4. Forget the 2 day/ 3 day/ 1 week rules

There are numerous rules that guys follow for when to contact the girl after the first date. We’ve heard anywhere from 2 days to a week.  However, CMB’s survey showed that most women would touch base the day after the date if it went well (assuming they would initiate). Therefore, you will not come across as a lonely desperate stalker if you contact her the following day.  Keep in mind that 1 out of 3 women said they would never follow up with a date after the first date. Moral of the story – if you want to see her again, don’t wait until Christmas to tell her.

How to Tell If She's Interested or Just Being Nice

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CMB Men’s Series is original content dedicated to (confused) men and dating in the city.
Part III of our series welcomes the return of Yue Xu, Dating Coach for men and Founder of Singlefied.  Visit her at www.singlefied.com and @SinglefiedYue.

It’s no secret that guys are terrible at reading women. Here’s how you can tell if she’s actually into you or just being nice.

CMB TIPS: Profiles and Photos

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Did you get PASSED again? Of course your Match would apologetically state the pseudo-compassionate line: “It’s Not You, It’s Me.”  But, maybe it IS you.  The CMB Tips series offer priceless advice from the pros on how to turn that PASS into a LIKE and that LIKE into a “HEY NICE TO MEET YOU IN PERSON, YOU TURNED OUT JUST AS I IMAGINED.”
Did you know that having a more descriptive profile with the right pictures can increase your LIKE rate by 30%?  So spend that extra minute on your profile to let your true colors show and excavate your Facebook photos for at least three pictures of you where you aren’t rapidly shaking your head side to side, yelling at your friend not to take the picture – those tend to turn out blurry.
CMB Profile Sample

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in 2012 in NYC, CMB aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships.

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It takes 2 to make it work

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It takes two to make a relationship work.
A simple text saying…
‘Hey, hope you have a good day’- in the morning,
‘Hang in there :)” – when you know your love is having a tough day.
Of course there are times when it’s hard to text or call.
Say you’re driving..getting grilled by your boss…or at a overcrowded place….
But how about when you’re done with the day and are getting ready for bed. Is it that hard to make a short phone call?
If you’re not willing to invest 30 seconds of your time to pick up the phone because you’re “TIRED”? you’re not ready to be in a relationship because that’s nothing but an excuse.
Driven and passionate about work, yet uncommitted  to love-that’s a problem.
Both should be equally treated with respect and attention.
For both men and women-
We’re not saying you to call or text WHILE your working, but to give the other person a heads up that you’re tied up and will call later when you get a chance, or to explain your situation why you couldn’t call in advance.
Isn’t that just simple courtesy?
Love takes work.
It requires you to be considerate and you always have to remind yourself to keep your manners to those who are closer to you- do not take advantage or their love for you.
Don’t expect your lover to always understand you first.
It can’t be a one way thing…
It has to be mutual and BOTH parties have to work together to make a relationship truly work.

Happy New Year! Dating Site Usage is Up by 15-20%

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Yes, it’s that time of the year again. In just one more day, it will be a new year and a lot of people are really feeling it. Don’t believe me? Recent research has shown that dating sites have been receiving a 15 to 20 percent jump in activity.
It’s no wonder. This year went by pretty fast and, for those who believe in certain Mayan prophecies concerning next year, trying to get a date before New Years Eve is the most important thing you can do before the end of the world. That apocalyptic feeling really isn’t new to this year, though. This time of year may be joyful on the surface but there has always been a deep undercurrent of loneliness for those looking through the window at other happy couples. Trying to get a date before New Years isn’t an act of desperation. This is an attempt to no longer be on the outside looking in.
This trend doesn’t stop after New Years. From now until Valentine’s Day is the busiest time for dating websites. We now live, quoting Thomas Friedman, in a hyper-connected world. This means that we feel intimately connected with more people outside our immediate social network than ever before because of social media and intimate access to the lives of others through their profiles.  Whereas before online dating there was uncertainty as to where you can meet that special someone, now you have sites that can help. While online dating was a joke ten years ago, now it’s more socially acceptable to say you met your partner online. To speak to this paradigm shift, approximately 10% of singles in the US used dating sites in 2011. I can’t speak for all of their motivations but it shows how the Internet has changed where dating begins.
There are a plethora of articles out there about how people are trying to connect with each other out of desperation. For the most part, that isn’t the case. I believe that this trend shows that, deep down, people are looking to find someone they click with to start the new year fresh. As Auld Lang Syne implies, the new year is the start of new beginnings as we throw everything else away. With the millions of potential connections out there, there is bound to be the perfect one for you.
Happy New Year one and all! May you find that special someone in the glorious year of 2012.
-Brett

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