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5 Ladies #DaretoShare Dating Stories for Women’s History Month

March 28, 2019/in Blog, Stories /by Paige Butterfield

The creative team at Coffee Meets Bagel thought a lot about what we could do to highlight Women’s History Month. We considered featuring our three co-founders who started it all. Or, maybe the team of fierce women who run things behind the scenes at CMB. Perhaps we could partner with a pro female athlete and use a catchy sports idiom about women taking control of their dating life.

But then it hit us like a stale bagel. Why not just feature the women of CMB who — every day on our app — are bravely putting themselves out there? They’re letting down their walls. They’re being vulnerable. And that’s badass.

Women’s History Month With CMB: #DaretoShare

It all started with a survey (because we sort of have an obsession with surveys at CMB, especially when it comes to Women’s History Month!) We asked the women of CMB to share two things:

  1. A time when they felt brave or confident about a decision on a date, in a relationship, or in their romantic life.
  2. Self love affirmations that showcase their strength as a woman. We had them use one of CMB’s profile starters, “I am… .”

We received so many inspiring quotes about female strength, but we selected just 5 of our fave women to #DaretoShare their stories publicly on our Instagram. We also set them up to star in their own photoshoot hosted by Snappr — an on-demand photography service!

We’re currently still rolling out their stories on our ‘gram right now, but here’s a special early release for our best bloggies.

1. I am…comfortable in my own skin.

(?: All images courtesy of @snappr.com)⁣

 

Kyla Berry
Art Therapist
Queens, NY

 

“I was seeing this guy for about 2 months, when out of the blue, he stopped responding to messages. I normally take that as a sign that they are no longer interested in dating. But I was particularly excited about this one, so I couldn’t let it go.

I sent him a message telling him how I felt and he responded within a minute. It didn’t work out for me in the end, but since that moment, I have no reservations about speaking the truth when getting to know someone I like.” — Kyla Berry

 

Yes ? Kyla ? Berry ?. You’re our new spirit animal. Nixing the dating games and just being straightforward with your feelings is always the best way to go. We also love that you took something that may have really hurt your feelings and are using it as fuel to be a more confident you. Here’s to even better relationships on the horizon!


2. I am…responsible for my own happiness.

(?: All images courtesy of @snappr.com)⁣

 

Jenny Baker
Director
Brooklyn, NY

 

“I began texting with a compatible match several months ago. Texting led to talking (how romantically old school!), talking led to dates, and dates led to….well…the joint decision to take it to the bedroom. Everything was going swimmingly until suddenly it wasn’t. The dates weren’t getting scheduled, the phone calls stopped, and the texts became scarce.

(Enter brave and fearless woman not afraid of rejection NOR going after what she wants, even if that’s a particular man.)

I didn’t succumb to the waiting game. I didn’t take the low road and ghost him. I didn’t shoot daggers via texts which could potentially, and unfairly, label me as just another ‘crazy girl.’ And I certainly didn’t pluck every flower petal in the Tri-State area playing, “He likes me, he likes me not.’ Instead, I remembered I was in control of my dating life and politely asked for a time to talk.” — Jenny Baker

 

Being ghosted really hurts. It’s natural to feel anxious waiting for a reply or to be scared of possible rejection. But, the way you responded to this by first recognizing the less-savory routes daters might take — like ghosting back or using hurtful words — and then choosing to do something out of the norm — calmly asking for a time to chat — was so brave of you! Even more daring was your choice to share your story. Thank you, Jenny ?!


3. I am…always learning and growing.

(?: All images courtesy of @snappr.com)⁣

 

Nicole Flaig
Neuroscientist
Arlington, VA

 

“I always tell myself to go on two dates (especially if there was alcohol on the first date) to get a clear image of chemistry and fit. I used to never stop there, especially when the “résumé” was so tempting. I went on a date with a man who was, by all accounts, perfect on paper and a physical specimen.

Fairly quickly I realized our values did not align, and I was confident enough to say so. I felt brave in (what felt like) throwing away a “great thing” because I knew in my heart it would be months down the road before I would admit it as a mistake, and even longer before one of us did something about it. Walking away from a wrong fit asap is my new brave.” — Nicole Flaig

 

Nicole — you are so. On. Point! In one of our recent blogs, CMB CEO Dawoon Kang said, “We end up wasting a ton of time on the wrong people because we don’t know what we want.” It’s not uncommon that our dates look amazing on paper (especially to someone else, like a family member or a friend), but that we just might not feel a “spark,” or in your case, share the same values. By being honest with yourself and confidently voicing your feelings, you may have saved both of you time and heartbreak. We can’t wait to see where your next dates take you ?!


4. I am…more than enough.

(?: All images courtesy of @snappr.com)⁣

 

Dahae Hwang
Science Instructor
Los Angeles, CA

 

“I started to have feelings for the person that I met through the CMB app. It was our third date when I told the person how I truly felt. I told him, “I appreciate having you in my life, and I enjoy spending time with you.” It was my first time when I truly expressed my feelings and was not afraid to honestly express myself.

I was proud that I was honest with him, although he didn’t feel the same way. The relationship didn’t work out at the end, but I learned that being honest with yourself and with others is the key to true happiness.” — Dahae Hwang

 

Dahae — it sounds like you’re in on the secret ?! While there isn’t really a blueprint to “true happiness” because it can mean different things to different people, honesty is a safe starting point. How can you be happy if you don’t feel like you can’t share the true you *and* all the real feels that come with? Keep shining, Dahae.


5. I am…reinventing myself.

(?: All images courtesy of @snappr.com)⁣

 

Chanté McMormick
Audiobook Narrator
Los Angeles, CA

 

“A guy I had been getting to know ghosted me. He was a couple years younger than me and I could surmise that he was really for someone under 40, particularly someone younger than him. But, oddly, he would do things to foster intimacy like ask if we could pray together at the end of phone calls. Despite this, he disappeared after asking me out on a second date.

I had never been ghosted but had been warned that this was always a possibility with online dating. I told him that I noticed he was ghosting me and that this was part of the online dating culture. However, as Christians, we didn’t have to comply with trends and could honor each other and the time we spent.

It’s not always a match, and I understand that. We went our separate ways and I was proud that I could communicate that we were both grown up enough to acknowledge that I wasn’t ‘his person’ and he wasn’t `mine’.” — Chanté McMormick

 

We love that not only did you talk to him about ghosting you, but that you openly recognized that ghosting “was part of the online dating culture,” and that you two “could [still] honor each other and the time spent.” This is so well put! Even if your date doesn’t feel like “your forever person,” you can still treat them with kindness and respect. Who knows — you might even make a long-term friend or learn something new about yourself! Communicating how you feel, however you feel, is the first step in breaking down these dating conventions. And it sounds like you’re already on your way ?

 


Ready to share your own story for Women’s History Month?

Follow these steps:

  1. Upload your own fab photo of yourself to Instagram.
  2. In the caption, use #DaretoShare to tell us about a time you felt brave on a date, in a relationship, or in your romantic life.
  3. Feel free to also include a self love affirmation using our profile starter, “I am… .”
  4. Tag @CoffeeMeetsBagel

We just might feature you on our own Instagram! Either way, we think you’re awesome for sharing your unique story. You’ll be helping to inspire women around the world by showing them that talking openly about feelings, dating, and relationships is actually brave AF.

 

If you’re curious about Coffee Meets Bagel, check out our blog, “9 Reasons Why Women Love Coffee Meets Bagel.” Or, start connecting now by downloading Coffee Meets Bagel.

Hosts From MTV’s ‘Catfish’ Get Real About Dating, Relationships at CMB Experience

October 25, 2018/in CMB Experiences /by Paige Butterfield


We can’t stop talking about our October 11th event, when special guests Nev Schulman and Laura Perlongo from MTV’s “Catfish” MC’d one of our CMB Experiences: The Gathering. As a refresher, The Gathering is a
series of intimate CMBxSofar concerts in NYC centered on meaningful dating and relationship stories.

The topic of the night?
Dating as self-discovery. 

“It was all of our past relationships and what we’ve learned from them that allowed us to very quickly fall in love with each other,” Nev said at the event.
Between live music artists, Nev and Laura even made special appearances on our Instagram Story, where they answered dating-related questions from our fans. One Instagram fan asked how to stay positive after a relationship doesn’t work out.

“Even if this relationship didn’t work out, you learn something from it,” Nev said. “You know probably better now what you don’t want from your next relationship. You learn, and you grow.”

We were kind of obsessed with Nev and Laura’s insight into dating as self-discovery, so we followed up with the duo via email after the show to ask more.

After Hours Q + A

Q –
How have your relationships in general helped you grow as a person?
A –
Laura: Seeing yourself through other people’s eyes is always a good thing. I’ve seen different sides of myself shine in different relationships and identified which parts of myself serve me best.
Nev: Like a forest fire, when things burn down, as painful as it may be, it clears the way for new growth. Early relationships taught me the importance of honesty and fidelity. Later, relationships taught me about confidence and compatibility. Most recently, I’ve learned about patience and compromise.
Q –
(For Laura) What were some learnings from past relationships that led you to your relationship with Nev?

A –
Laura: If it’s not a good fit or timing is off, you can feel it in your core. Not to say it’s always perfect, but when you’re both ready for a real relationship, it’s very obvious. I learned that having similar goals and priorities (in my case adventure, family, and being open to change) are really important in choosing a life partner.  
Q –
Dating can be hard. How can people stay positive and hopeful even when things don’t work out?

A –
Laura: Just remembering that there is no such thing as a failed experience. It’s an oxymoron. An experience you choose (i.e., to go on a date) is always worthwhile. No matter if it ends after one drink or turns into a long relationship, meeting people always teaches you something about yourself and/or helps someone else grow.
Nev: Don’t get discouraged. Knowledge of the person you DON’T want to be with is just as important as knowing the person you DO want to be with.
Q –
In the media, finding “the one” is generally depicted as the ultimate achievement. Any tips to help people filter out all that pressure throughout their dating journey?
A –
Laura: I think “the one” is simply time and place. When you find someone with the same commitment to love as you, you’ll know. Until then, don’t sweat it. Take it as an exciting time of exploration. In fact, once you DO find “the one” you might even miss all the random adventures you had when you were dating.

Nev: Every relationship has an expiration date. So, you should just be worried about finding the one you makes you happy NOW. Actual NOW happy. Not “future” happy.

Q –
“Cuffing season” is upon us. How do you think people can make sure they’re “cuffing” for the right reasons?
A–
Laura: Cuffing season is really about body heat and laziness. Make sure you have a warm coat. Very warm. And if you have a very warm coat and still want to see the person you’re dating, then you’re probably good.
For more dating and relationship advice from Nev and Laura, check out their Facebook Watch series with Attn, “We Need To Talk.”
About The Gathering and Coffee Meets Bagel Experiences
The Gathering is part of CMB Experiences – real-world events in real-world spaces, where people can unplug and practice being present. Together. We started Coffee Meets Bagel Experiences because we don’t think meaningful connections should be limited to the online world.
In fact, while the CMB journey starts out online, the most important connections are made face-to-face. Check out other exciting CMB Experiences we’ve put together, like the Run Date Festival and Camp Meets Bagel.

Don’t forget to follow us on Instagram and Twitter to learn more about upcoming CMB Experiences.

Singles & Valentine’s Day

February 10, 2018/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by Audrie Thompson

February 14th is upon us! What are singles doing for Valentine’s Day this year? We surveyed over 650 CMBers around the world to determine the latest dating trends and stats around the holiday synonymous with love, and here’s what we found…
CMB Valentine's Day 2018

Say Cheese! It’s World Smile Day

October 3, 2016/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by CMB

October 7, 2016 is World Smile Day®, a day created by the Harvey Ball World Smile Foundation whose mission is to improve the world, one smile at a time. At Coffee Meets Bagel, we were curious if we could improve your dating profile, one smile at a time :)
We analyzed the profile photos of ~300 singles who use our app to find out what role your smile plays in finding true love in the digital age. Check out the stats below to learn how to get your profile smile in tip top shape!
How to perfect your dating profile

9 Ways To Get A Second Date

September 19, 2016/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by CMB

Want to know the secrets to a successful first date? More importantly, want to land a second date? While love may be unpredictable, first impressions can make or break a connection. We decided to see if happy couples did something noticeably different than singles when it comes to first dates. Take a look at these 9 findings you need to know before your next date…
9 ways to get a second date

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in 2012 in NYC, CMB aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships.

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International Love: Dating Around the World

August 4, 2015/in Date Stats, Dating in NYC, Dating in SF /by Guest Blogger

The following article is a guest post, courtesy of Adrienne Shih

Ever wonder what dating is like in another part of the world? We asked global CMBers about different aspects of their love lives, with everything from their eligibility to how much they’re willing to pay on the first date. Responses varied across the board, but there’s one thing most CMBers can agree with — dating, regardless of where you live, is difficult. But don’t worry, that’s where we can help.
Take a look at what members said, from where the most eligible singles are to what characteristics they value most in a match.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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thoughts on naked pics

"Just Don't Show Your Face" And Other Thoughts On Naked Pics

November 13, 2014/in Date Tips, Funny & Videos, Tips on CMB /by Guest Blogger


 
If you liked this post, check out Dick Pics: What Makes Men Think We Want Them?


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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That Awkward Moment…When You Pay For Your Date

November 11, 2014/in Dating in LA /by Guest Blogger

~ The No-Dough Bagel ~
I connected with No-Dough Bagel a few weeks ago and after several back and forth messages, we decided to meet up for lunch one weekend. We picked a place, but when we arrived, the line was too long and we were too hungry. So, we opted for a faster option that happened to be cash only. Assuming that No-Dough Bagel was literate enough to read the 10 CASH ONLY signs posted around the restaurant, I didn’t bother warning him. Also, I didn’t want to bring up anything regarding paying for the meal because I didn’t want him to think that I expected him to pay.
Raised to be incredibly independent, I don’t normally like it when dates pay for me; in fact, I always offer and sometimes insist. Contrary to many men and women telling me that it’s typical for the man to pay for the date, I just can’t let it slide. Regardless, when the check came, No-Dough Bagel reached for his wallet, took out a credit card, and firmly placed it on the bill, insisting that he get the lunch.
Sadly, I had to inform him that it was cash only and continued to reach for my own wallet. To my expected dismay, a look of fear came over No-Dough Bagel’s face as he informed me that he literally had no cash (this was further proven when he showed me his billfold with no bills). I nonchalantly said that it wasn’t a problem, that I could get it, and that I didn’t want to make it a big deal. He obviously felt embarrassed, but kept talking about it and wouldn’t let it go, which made me feel even more awkward for having to pay for him. However, let it be known that he did not even offer to run to an ATM (conveniently located inside this cash-only restaurant). Weird? Sure. Did I just want to get out of there at that point? Yes.
He walked me back to my car, talking about how awkward it was, and when we departed, we said the typical, “We should do this again!” and it was even followed up by subsequent texts about how he will get the next meal since I got this one. I kindly agreed and kept reassuring him that it wasn’t an issue. After I sat down in my car, I texted my friend, “That awkward moment when you pay for your bagel date because he has no cash…” and strangely enough, received a text that said, “OMG THAT HAPPENED TO ME TOO!”
And this brings me to the point of this post. I’ve now heard a few stories from different friends about similar situations and all I can say is that I am shocked at how often this happens! Isn’t it just common sense to always have at least $20 in cash on you just in case of emergencies? I know we live in a virtually cashless society, but I always have some rainy day cash in my wallet and let me tell you – it is definitely enough to cover my half of a meal if need be. I’m not saying carry enough to pay for an entire date, but everyone should be able to produce some cash – especially when they are going out to a meal. Moral of this story is that the Boy Scouts knew what was up – always be prepared – and they’re probably going to be the bagels that wind up with girlfriends.
~ Read more of my Bagel Stories here!


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Online Dating Statistics

Ladies, How Well Do You Actually Know Men?

November 6, 2014/in Date Stats /by Guest Blogger

A few weeks ago, we asked all you fine ladies to answer some questions about how you think men’s brains are working when it comes to dating, and the results are in! Take a look at what we found out; some of the results might even shock you. It turns out that guys are way more nervous about having something to talk about than what you look like on a first date, and a sense of humor is by far the most important quality in a partner to both men and women. Do you think you’re a dating pro? A man-mindreader? Check out what other ladies thought about these common first date signals below and see how you stack up against what the guys actually said, then let us know what you think!
reading dating signals
Curious as to what guys think of the signals you send them? Click here to see how well they really understand you.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Online Dating Statistics

Guys, How Well Do You Actually Know Women?

November 6, 2014/in Date Stats /by Guest Blogger

A few weeks ago, we asked all you dashing gentlemen to answer some questions about what you think you know about your date’s behavior, and the results are in! Take a look at what we found out; some of the results might even shock you. It turns out that most women prefer their date dresses casually as opposed to super fancy, and a sense of humor is by far the most important quality in a partner to both men and women. Do you think you’re a dating pro? A lady-whisperer? Check out what other dudes thought about these common dating signals below and see how you stack up against what the ladies actually said, then let us know what you think!
Online Dating Statistics For Him
Curious as to what ladies think of the signals you send them? Click here to see how well they really understand you!


Fill out my online form.

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

App Store
Get it on Google Play

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