~ The Bagel With The Dragon Tattoo ~
A few months ago, I met a bagel who, if I had a ‘checklist’, would have met 90% of the requirements:
- Good job? Check. He even works more hours than I do.
- Drives a car? Check. Sadly, this is actually something we have to put on the checklist in LA.
- Good family relationship? Check.
- Doesn’t live in certain area codes that I’m banned from? Check. (Don’t ask..it’ll be a later post)
- Similar interests? Check. He seems to be my type of adventurous.
- Love of hip hop? Check. We share similar views on Drake, Tupac, and Eminem.
- Love of food? Check. We talked about restaurants for an hour straight.
In order for me to do this post justice, I should also explain that he looked like someone I could bring home to Mom. He was what you would describe as a “nice looking Asian boy”. Every Asian mother’s dream!
A few dates in, we were hanging out at my place and we were just discussing how neither one of us is really traditionally “Asian”. I barely speak Chinese, he doesn’t at all, and we both don’t really identify with the culture as much as some of our other friends do. Then, as things were getting a little bit heavy, his shirt came off and low and behold, there lied a very Asian tattoo right on his chest, staring me in the face. And boy, was that tattoo big.
Now, I love a good tattoo just as much as the next girl. However, something about this tattoo really jumped out at me and made me stop dead in my tracks and hold back laughter. Maybe it was how big it was. Maybe it was what it actually was (it wasn’t a dragon, by the way). Maybe it was just the juxtaposition of his personality and the tattoo. I know, that’s kind of mean, but it’s just really funny when you imagine a nice Asian boy who just told you how un-Asian he is, then BAM, it’s like I’m hanging out with a Triad member.
This could probably be seen as a ‘bad boy’ element that gives him a bit of edge, which I’m sure his future girlfriend would love. I, on the other hand, could not stop the many questions that raced into my mind (When did you get it? Why is it so big? Do your parents know? What are you going to do when you’re 70? What does it mean? Are you actually part of a Triad? If so, can you induct me? Would I have to get a tattoo as well?) and unfortunately my habit of word-vomit came over and I actually did ask him 20 questions about the tattoo.
Sadly, I decided that the fact that I could never take him seriously with his shirt off was probably a good reason for me to not go down this path toward the Forbidden City. Sorry, Bagel With The Dragon Tattoo, I am positive you will find a great girl because you’re a great guy. I’m just the asshole who can’t get past that tat.
If you enjoyed this post, perhaps you’ll want to read When You’re on a Date…Squirrel
About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.