Coffee Meets Bagel
  • Home
  • Careers
    • CMB Culture
    • Open Positions
  • Blog
  • Help Center
  • Press
  • Terms, Privacy, & Copyright
  • Menu
You are here: Home / Date Tips
collage of cmb

Online Dating Safety Tips: 5 Ways to Spot a Scammer

June 7, 2019/in Blog, Date Tips /by CMB

A note from Jenny, head of customer experience

Finding a good date used to be at the top of my “things I dread” list, right after public speaking and queuing at the bank. So, when apps like Coffee Meets Bagel came onto the scene, I was beyond relieved. I didn’t have to frequent loud bars, or try to recreate that rom-com scene where the woman bumps into a hunk at a supermarket and the 99-cent-oranges display goes flying.

But while coming across a good date got easier, so did coming across a less savory type: scammers.

Now as the head of customer experience at Coffee Meets Bagel, I’ve heard the happily-ever-after stories and the I-fell-for-a-scam stories. And while CMB does have technology in place to prevent scammers from joining in the first place, we can’t catch all of them by ourselves (yet).

So before you can star in your own dating app success story, check out my tips on how to stay safe.

Quick Online Dating Safety Tips

Buckle up! Safety, first. Before we hop into the five signs your match might be a scammer, check out these quick tips.

  • Never make financial moves with someone you met online. That means not sending money, gift cards, or account info – as well as believing investment advice or “get rich quick” claims.  
  • Keep your exact workplace and address a secret until you’ve met in person and have built trust over time. (Some experts advise also keeping your last name private until after your first date.)
  • Tell your friends or family about when & where you’re meeting a match for the first time. Provide your own transportation, and always meet in a safe, public place, such as a coffee shop.

And, most importantly, if you ever feel uncomfortable or harassed when chatting with a match, stop talking to them and report them on the app. Then, block them from other messaging services if applicable. If you’re already on a date, leave immediately. Dating should never feel scary.

Signs Your Match Might Be a Scammer

Now that we’ve taken care of the crucial safety tips, you’re all set! Well, almost. I want you to spend time on matches who matter on CMB, not scammers. Here’s how to spot if your match is a scammer before you get involved.

They Go From 0-100

Oftentimes, scammers use artful tactics to try to sweep you off your feet. They might shower you with compliments or use flowery, romantic language right off the bat. They might give you a wholesome Disney-eqsue monologue about how they’re “just looking for love,” and “U the one 4 me, babe.” But I know you’re smarter than that, so you’ll see your match moving too fast as a red flag.

Another red flag: They’ll want to take things off the app and start texting, calling, or using other messaging apps (such as Kik, WhatsApp, or WeChat) ASAP. To cut to the chase, they may even include this contact info in their bio.

One thing to note: Scammers nowadays are extra sneaky. So while they might sweep you off of your feet quickly to gain your trust, they could wait a bit before actually trying to pull off their scam. This is especially popular in cryptocurrency dating scams, so be wary of the long game.  

Their Stories Pull on Your Heartstrings

Gone are the days when all scammers were Nigerian princes. Nowadays, they’re architects, oil-rig engineers, geologists, make-up artists, nurses, and more. But one of the most common careers scammers claim to have is that of a soldier, or any career related to the military. And oftentimes they are oh-so-conveniently stationed far overseas where they can’t meet you in person.

But their real job title? A sly scammer. They may even claim to be religious (a tactic used for inspiring trust), or tell you a sob story: they’re a recent widow and their partner has passed in a tragic accident. Or, perhaps they have a sick child or parent they care for. While these unfortunate circumstances may be true for a small portion of singles involved in online dating, one of the telltale signs you’ve matched with a scammer doesn’t come until later — when they ask for your money.

They’re Just Too Good to Be True

If your match has profile photos that belong in a magazine catalogue, you’ve either met a model, or a scammer. And while both exist in real life (models aren’t Bigfoot, after all), it would be very unlikely for a real person not to have any casual, non-professional photos in their profile pic lineup.

Take note of other profile/photo inconsistencies. For example, if their profile says they’re 32, but they look only 22 in their picture, that’s a red flag. Likewise, if their profile claims they have a high level of education, but their grammar is disjointed, something might be up.

On top of conflicting photos, the person in question could be everything you’re looking for. You share all of the same values, never disagree, the conversation is always flowing – they’re basically a match made in heaven. After a few weeks, they might start using pet names for you or even profess their love. Remember what we talked about: If they get too lovey too quick, it’s a red flag.

Meeting in Person Isn’t an Option

We know that the most meaningful connections happen face-to-face, so on Coffee Meets Bagel, we encourage members to meet in person. So if your match isn’t keen on meeting in real life or over video chat, you should raise an eyebrow.

One of the most common excuses scammers use to avoid meeting in person is claiming that they work abroad. Some scammers will dodge video chats and phone calls by claiming to be “too shy” or because they’re dealing with trust issues from past relationships. But if you’ve been talking to someone for days (or weeks) and haven’t taken these steps, that should set off alarm bells.

In situations like this, fact-checking is your friend. Try running a Google reverse image search to check if they have multiple profiles under different names or with different info. Some scammers may also steal photos from influencers, low-profile celebrities, or stock sources.

They Ask for Money, Gift Cards, or Account Info

Lastly, and most importantly, if your match asks you for money, gift cards, or your account information, stop all communication immediately. It is extremely likely this person is a scammer.

But, it isn’t always clear right away. Many scammers will play the long-game by trying to build trust with you over time. Then, suddenly, there’s an “emergency,” and they need money quickly. Here’s a few types of fake emergencies they may claim to have:

  1.  They were robbed and need money
  2.  They have to book a last-minute business trip
  3.  They need a loan
  4.  They or their family member has a medical emergency

Sometimes, scammers may also ask for gift cards, such as an iTunes gift card. But, you should never trust a match who claims they need anything from you but your time and words, even if they promise to pay you back.

Another way a scammer might try to steal from you is less direct: by gaining access to your accounts. While some may directly ask you for your account info, routing numbers, social security number, or driver’s license info, others may be more sneaky.

If your match asks you strangely specific personal questions about old addresses, your pets’ names, or schools you’ve attended, be cautious. They could be trying to gain access to your accounts by resetting your passwords via security question answers.

A final reminder: Even if someone doesn’t directly ask you for money or personal information, matches who spend a lot of time talking up investments, cryptocurrency, or finances should be viewed as suspicious. 

A common trick with these investment scammers will present themselves as super-wealthy. They’ll talk about deals that are too good to be true – all you have to do is try out their plan. So while you might think you’re not directly sending anyone money, you could still get scammed by third-party sites. 

How to Report a Match on CMB

If you think you’ve come across or matched with a scammer, or if your match has violated our terms of service, please report them. By reporting a scammer, you’re preventing them from scamming other lovely bagels on our app in the future.

To report a bagel in Suggested or Discover, simply tap on the flag icon in their profile. 


Ready to meet someone special? Download Coffee Meets Bagel on iOS or Android.

Singles & Valentine’s Day

February 10, 2018/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by Audrie Thompson

February 14th is upon us! What are singles doing for Valentine’s Day this year? We surveyed over 650 CMBers around the world to determine the latest dating trends and stats around the holiday synonymous with love, and here’s what we found…
CMB Valentine's Day 2018

Bagels Tell All

March 6, 2017/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by CMB
March is Women’s History Month, so we’re celebrating women all month at CMB! We wanted to give women a chance to speak up and make their voices heard. We surveyed 250 women to find out what they look for when using dating apps. They shared their thoughts on what kind of profiles they like, what gets them chatting, what turns them off, and more. Take a look at what they had to say—and maybe take a few pointers, too!

Bagels Tell All - Coffee Meets Bagel

Say Cheese! It’s World Smile Day

October 3, 2016/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by CMB

October 7, 2016 is World Smile Day®, a day created by the Harvey Ball World Smile Foundation whose mission is to improve the world, one smile at a time. At Coffee Meets Bagel, we were curious if we could improve your dating profile, one smile at a time :)
We analyzed the profile photos of ~300 singles who use our app to find out what role your smile plays in finding true love in the digital age. Check out the stats below to learn how to get your profile smile in tip top shape!
How to perfect your dating profile

9 Ways To Get A Second Date

September 19, 2016/in Date Stats, Date Tips /by CMB

Want to know the secrets to a successful first date? More importantly, want to land a second date? While love may be unpredictable, first impressions can make or break a connection. We decided to see if happy couples did something noticeably different than singles when it comes to first dates. Take a look at these 9 findings you need to know before your next date…
9 ways to get a second date

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in 2012 in NYC, CMB aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships.

App Store
Get it on Google Play

9 Things Singles Hate to Hear over the Holidays

December 7, 2015/in Funny & Videos /by CMB

1. “Why are you still single?”

I Don't Know
2. “You’re not getting any younger…”
You Don't Say
3. “So, when are you getting married? I want to see grandkids.”
When I Ever Am Around Kids

4. “Stop being so picky! If you just lower the bar, you’ll be married by now.”

You Have Done That to Yourself

5. “He/She is out there for you. You just have to look harder.”

Uh Huh

6. “Why don’t you reach out to [insert your ex’s name]? S/he might still be single.”

That Is Funny

7. Out of pity: “You will find someone soon! Don’t worry.”

I Am Fine

8. “You need to get out there more!”

You Have No Idea

9. “Use this time to work on yourself.”

You Are the One to Talk


Fill out my online form.

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

App Store
Get it on Google Play

9 Truths of a Perfect First Kiss

November 18, 2015/in Date Stats, Date Tips, For Her, For Him /by Audrie Thompson

The first kiss is often unpredictable. When is the right time? Should it be a light kiss or a deep one? Do I need to ask for permission?
The fact of the matter is that there is no right or wrong answer. Men and women often want different things – romantically speaking here. But we can never be so sure. We decided it was time to take this matter into our own hands and ask our CMB members what they look for in a first kiss. What we found? The perfect first kiss isn’t so different for everyone after all…
PerfectFirstKissTruths

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in 2012 in NYC, CMB aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships.

App Store
Get it on Google Play

Kissing in the United States is like…

November 4, 2015/in Date Tips /by Audrie Thompson

If there’s something we all dread, awkward first kisses probably make the list. Whether it happens on the first date or the fifth, kissing isn’t your usual chat-over-brunch topic. But haven’t you wondered what people really look for in a first kiss?
Normally we don’t kiss and tell, but we decided it’s time to find out what men and women really want. Get ready to kiss your awkward first kiss goodbye, because we surveyed 9,300 CMB ladies & gents who are about to give you the answer to all your questions.
Kissing_US
About Coffee Meets Bagel: Coffee Meets Bagel is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in 2012 in NYC, Coffee Meets Bagel aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships. It’s free to download in the App Store & Google Play Store.
App Store
Get it on Google Play

Kissing in Hong Kong is like…

November 4, 2015/in Date Tips /by Audrie Thompson

Get ready to kiss goodbye to your awkward first kisses, HK-ers. We’re about to give you the lowdown on this kissing business.
We asked your fellow CMB-ers in Hong Kong to give us all (and when we say all, we mean ALL) the details on their kind of first kiss. When’s the right time? How intimate is too intimate? Normally we don’t kiss & tell, but here’s what ladies & gents really want in a first kiss…
Kissing_HK

Kissing in Singapore is like…

November 4, 2015/in Date Tips /by Audrie Thompson

We’ve all agonized over having the awkward first kiss, whether it’s on the first date or the fifth. When’s the perfect time? How intimate is too intimate? Am I even doing this right?!

If you find yourself asking these questions, you’re not alone. But no fear – we got you covered. We asked your fellow CMB members in Singapore to tell us everything they look for in a first kiss. Take a look at what we found and get ready to say goodbye to that awkward first kiss.

Kissing_Singapore

Page 3 of 23‹12345›»

Categories

  • Blog
  • Boston
  • Chicago
  • CMB 101
  • CMB Experiences
  • CMB Says
  • CMB Updates
  • Date Ideas
  • Date Stats
  • Date Stories
  • Date Tips
  • Dating for Men
  • Dating in LA
  • Dating in NYC
  • Dating in SF
  • DC
  • For Her
  • For Him
  • From the founders
  • Funny & Videos
  • Home
  • LA
  • LGBT Dating
  • list
  • moments
  • News
  • NYC
  • Product
  • SF
  • Stats
  • Stories
  • Tips
  • Tips on CMB
  • Uncategorized
  • Virtual dates

Get the app

Get the App for iOS
Get the App for Android
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Careers
  • Press
  • Help Center
  • Privacy & Terms

Join the app

Join the app on iOS
Join the app on Android
© Copyright - Coffee Meets Bagel - Enfold Theme by Kriesi
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram
  • Youtube
Scroll to top

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse the site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

OKLearn more

Cookie and Privacy Settings

How we use cookies

We may request cookies to be set on your device. We use cookies to let us know when you visit our websites, how you interact with us, to enrich your user experience, and to customize your relationship with our website. Click on the different category headings to find out more. You can also change some of your preferences. Note that blocking some types of cookies may impact your experience on our websites and the services we are able to offer.

Essential Website Cookies

These cookies are strictly necessary to provide you with services available through our website and to use some of its features. Because these cookies are strictly necessary to deliver the website, you cannot refuse them without impacting how our site functions. You can block or delete them by changing your browser settings and force blocking all cookies on this website.

Google Analytics Cookies

These cookies collect information that is used either in aggregate form to help us understand how our website is being used or how effective our marketing campaigns are, or to help us customize our website and application for you in order to enhance your experience. If you do not want that we track your visist to our site you can disable tracking in your browser here:

Other external services

We also use different external services like Google Webfonts, Google Maps and external Video providers. Since these providers may collect personal data like your IP address we allow you to block them here. Please be aware that this might heavily reduce the functionality and appearance of our site. Changes will take effect once you reload the page.

Google Webfont Settings:

Google Map Settings:

Vimeo and Youtube video embeds:

Privacy Policy

You can read about our cookies and privacy settings in detail on our Privacy Policy Page. privacy-policy