9 Things Singles Hate to Hear over the Holidays

1. “Why are you still single?”

I Don't Know
2. “You’re not getting any younger…”
You Don't Say
3. “So, when are you getting married? I want to see grandkids.”
When I Ever Am Around Kids

4. “Stop being so picky! If you just lower the bar, you’ll be married by now.”

You Have Done That to Yourself

5. “He/She is out there for you. You just have to look harder.”

Uh Huh

6. “Why don’t you reach out to [insert your ex’s name]? S/he might still be single.”

That Is Funny

7. Out of pity: “You will find someone soon! Don’t worry.”

I Am Fine

8. “You need to get out there more!”

You Have No Idea

9. “Use this time to work on yourself.”

You Are the One to Talk


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Jennifer Lawrence Quotes

14 Celebrities Get Real, And Really Funny, About The Dating Game

Celebrities are known for being caught saying really stupid things like “I know it’s tuna, but it says ‘Chicken of the Sea,” or thinking that they sell walls at Walmart, but we found a few of them who actually have some pretty clever (and accurate) things to say about dating. I love Miley and Frank’s advice. And Emma Stone is just perfect.


Chelsea Handler Quotes


Rob Delaney Quotes


Miley Cyrus Quotes


Kanye West Quotes


Jennifer Lawrence Quotes


Jason Schwartzman Quotes


Will Ferrell Quotes


Mindy Kaling Quotes


Stephen Colbert Quotes


Kevin Hart Quotes


Conan O'Brien Quotes


Frank Ocean Quotes


Adam Sandler Quotes


Emma Stone Quotes
If you liked this post, check out 9 Most Ridiculous Messages Women Have Received On Dating Apps (For Real).


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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singles hate to hear

10 Things Singles Hate To Hear Around Valentine's Day

(This post was originally published in January 2014 and is back by popular demand!)

No other time of year is as difficult to be single as on Valentine’s Day. My inbox is flooded with emails on creative date spots, unique gifts, and best restaurants and I am constantly reminded of how I, as a single person, can’t partake in these activities. As for the rest of the 364 days of the year, I have to listen to this nonsense!
Share this post with your attached friends, who keep giving you useless, albeit well-intentioned, dating advice.

10 things singles like me HATE to hear:

1. “You are so good looking and so smart. How are you still single?”

Dating advice for couples
That’s just adding insult upon injury. Despite the fact that I am good looking and smart, I am still single! Thank you for reminding me of that.
2. “You are too picky! If you just lowered the bar, you’d be in a relationship.”
Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends
I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that wanting my date to have a job AND a sense of humor was setting the bar too high. Which one do you recommend I give up on?
3. “You need to get out there more!”
Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

Let’s see: I have a profile on Coffee Meets Bagel, Match, Tinder, OKCupid and a dozen other online dating sites. I chat strangers up at the gym and the grocery store. I have my friends set me up on blind dates.  I go out on Friday & Saturday nights. What else do you want me to do?

4. “So, when are YOU getting married?” (Usually asked at a younger sibling’s or cousin’s wedding)

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

Well, looks like today isn’t MY day. But when it does happen, I promise to send you a save-the-date at least 6 months in advance.

5. “It will happen when you least expect it.”

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

Really? It sounds like something I read in a fortune cookie. Nothing has changed whether I expected or not. I’ve been “least expecting it” for like the past 12 months.

6. “Use this time to work on yourself.”

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

I go to the gym. I get plenty of sleep. I eat organic, vegan & gluten free.  I have hiked Machu Picchu and Kilimanjaro. I have learned 3 new languages in the past year. I’ve taken cooking classes. What else do I need to work on?

7. “I envy you. I wish I was still single.”

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

No, you don’t. You say that once a year when at someone’s bachelor/bachelorette party, you feel guilty about getting drunk and leaving your significant other at home. Every other night, you love that you have someone to cook a meal with, drag to a terrible movie, go on long strolls in the park or pretty much anything else that single people have to do alone.

8. “It’s his/her loss.”

Dating advice for couples

Actually it isn’t. He/she was really good looking, smart, funny, interesting, considerate and engaging. So it’s really my loss.

9. “You just have to hope and be optimistic.”

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

What does that even mean? Sounds more like some campaign slogan than dating advice.

10. “He/she is out there for you. You just have to look harder.”

Dating Tips from Singles to their Attached Friends

Sounds like I gotta go on a “needle in the haystack” finding mission. Also, see #3 above. I have pretty much turned every haystack upside down looking for this needle.

 

If you liked this post, you might enjoy 4 Funniest Dating Vines of 2014.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Tinder

If Tinder Advertised Like eHarmony

Here at Coffee Meets Bagel, we’re proud to have intelligent users who are looking for something a bit more fulfilling than a one night stand. Did you know that more than 50 couples who met on Coffee Meets Bagel have gotten engaged or married since we launched in 2012?! Case in point, Tinder users are generally looking for something different than CMB users. (You can read more about this here.) We just couldn’t help but laugh at this spoof, it’s the perfect combination of humor and accuracy. Give it a gander!

If you liked this post, check out What Happened When We Tested 11 Different Male Profile Pictures.

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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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dating vines

4 Funniest Dating Vines From 2014

Another year slows down to its end but that doesn’t mean that it wasn’t a funny one! As a final celebration for 2014, Coffee Meets Bagel put together a list of the funniest dating Vines we’ve found over the internet to conclude your year in tears…tears of laughter of course!

1. When someone you like is single!

2. If I looked like this…

3. Children in the 21st Century

4. New Relationship VS Old Relationship


 

If you enjoyed this post, you might like "On Kissing 100 Boys...And Counting".


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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Get it on Google Play

Is Watching Porn While You're In A Relationship Cheating?

Okay everyone, time to get real here. You watch porn. Your friends watch porn. Maybe you watch porn with your friends. It’s a weird thing, like pooping (weird comparison, I know, sorry), that everybody does, but for some reason, doesn’t talk about. So, assuming that you don’t talk openly about watching porn with your girlfriend — also assuming you don’t watch porn with your girlfriend — is it considered cheating? Some of the Elite Daily staff are here to put in their two cents on the topic.

If you liked this post, check out The Dark Side: Speed Dating Star Wars Style.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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iliza shlesinger

Think You Know A Girl's Idea Of A Perfect Date? Think Again

Iliza Shlesinger, winner of season 6 of Last Comic Standing is, in my opinion, the most hilarious woman on the planet. She is blunt, she can be crass, but she is almost always on point. I’ve shown her full length comedy special to several people over the past year that it’s been on Netflix, and I have yet to find a single person, male or female, who doesn’t find her absolutely hysterical. Here’s a snippet of one of her shows at The Laugh Factory that might make you think twice when you’re planning your next date.

Here’s another suggestion: Take your date to one of her shows, or just snuggle up with your date and watch her special “Warpaint” on Netflix. (Bringing a bottle of red wine or two probably wouldn’t hurt either.)
If you liked this post, check out 27 Tips From Jenna Marbles To Help You Suck Less At Dating.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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facebook stalking

We're All Stalkers, Let's Just Admit It

It’s something that literally everyone who has a Facebook has been guilty of at some point — and it’s totally okay! This social phenomenon of Facebook stalking has interested me for several years now, to the point that I studied it in college. What I found was that the social acceptability of admitting that you’ve “stalked” someone is completely dependent on your offline relationship with them. It’s not at all weird to tell your best friend that you saw her pictures from a couple weeks ago, but it’s super weird  to tell an ex, or even just an acquaintance, that you know what they did last weekend. What would it be like to live in a world where this wasn’t strange behavior anymore? I mean, people post things on their profiles for other people to see, right? Isn’t that the point?

 
If you liked this post, check out 6 Ways to Start a Conversation With Just About Anyone.


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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thoughts on naked pics

"Just Don't Show Your Face" And Other Thoughts On Naked Pics


 
If you liked this post, check out Dick Pics: What Makes Men Think We Want Them?


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About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB  is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.

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World's Worst Person To Watch Football With

Football is a weekly tradition from the month of August-December in the United States. Millions of viewers huddle around the TV each Sunday to enjoy a day of tackling, scoring, and excitement. Just a word of advice- be careful who you invite over to watch the game with you.
CAUTION: Extremely stereotype-based